Shifti - User contributions [en]

Talk:Rebuilding

2009-07-14T22:48:41Z

99.179.100.78: /* exposititory additions */ vampyres, oh my

__TOC__

An interesting concept, but you should know one of the things which led to the deterioration of the Blind Pig setting was people pushing the 'powers' concept too far, especially in regards to inanimorphs. While a power like the one your character has can be canon if it at least has a seemingly plausible explanation, it is best to impose some sort of limit such as energy expenditure/conditions/time required. In Allan's case it could be linked to his heartbeat, requiring either complete calm or hyperactivity. This is, of course, just an example, but consequences or costs should be considered. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

:Thank you Lloyd. I was trying to figure out a way to say this and you managed to do it for me.
:Yes - there needs to be a real, physically measurable limit. You '''''CAN''''' have things like this power - it just needs to have some limits. As it says on the [[Pig and Whistle|setting page]] there are certain [[Pig and Whistle#Caveats|caveats]] to the really funky powers. For instance, my character 'Scott' can toss around balls of superheated plasma - but the number and/or power of them is strictly limited and if he uses too many of them or ones of too high a power, the requirements could kill him.
:I like the idea of this power, but just want to ask you to be careful with how you use it so that the setting doesn't get into the territory of the "super-powerful beings that do nothing" that has happened to the Blind Pig setting. Yes - I probably contributed to that with my character "Max Grant" - but that story was done to try and point out that the "great power, great responsibility" bit from Spiderman isn't something the average joe would think about. (In truth, it had its genesis from a line of Sue Carters in the "One Small Step" epic by [[User:Michael Bard|Bard]] and [[User:Cubist|Cubist]], but I'm allowed to put multiple levels of meaning into a story, right?)
:Anyway... You seem to be doing well with this first attempt at weaving a narrative. When you've finished with it, I will try to give you some good, constructive criticism and advice on how to make it better (if you want it). -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 19:28, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

Which is why the "no Mary Sues" rule exists, right? When writing it, I had the PAW guide open in another tab for quick reference. It's in a very early stage right now. As in, what you see on the page there is whatever I could crap out from 11:00 to 3:40 that night. I'm just now getting a full idea for what Allan can and can't do. After reading through it once again, I realize that I need to fix a few things. I'm hoping to build a story arc based out of the Republic of Texas. Specifically a small town that gets bombed when a fighter pilot decides that dropping his surplus bombs would be a great idea. Allan will have to choose to help rebuild the town, or Enlist with the rangers to go after the party responsible. The setting, If my timeline is correct, is about 2020ish, when the fighting should be nearing it's end. I don't know what faction the pilot belongs to, but that will be an important choice. Anyways, I don't want to accidentally wreck your carefully crafted world with my bad fanfiction.
:Speaking of "One Small Step," was that ever finished? It feels like Several of the Jubatus storylines just kinda frayed off at the ends. I really enjoyed that piece, as well as most everything else [[User:Michael Bard|Bard]] and [[User:Cubist|Cubist]] have written. That's the main reason I found this website. I was searching for more of Cubists work, and it led me here. Both of their writings on world building and character development have helped me a lot. Cubist even has an [http://www.anthrozine.com/edit/edt.long.0a.html editorial] on Power characters.

I'll come up with a complete history for Allan soon enough, almost like a D&D character sheet. Complete with sudophysics to explain powers and limitations. Right now I need to fix the "Block of Text" syndrome that plagues my work. That, and my unnatural affinity for commas, is going to be the end of me. I gladly accept any form of criticism that you wish to hand out. Constructive, Destructive, Obstructive. Anything to make a better story. Thanks to both of you for reading and responding to this so soon.

I'm also trying to create a PAW quick reference guide from the full PAW guidebook and stories that are currently in production. Hopefully It'll help keep everything straight between stories, as well as help starting authors like me delve into the universe.
--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 21:56, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

:I've never been able to get a straight answer out of [[User:Cubist|Cubist]] or [[User:Michael Bard|Bard]] about "One Small Step". Bard says that Cubist is the one holding up the story, Cubist says that it is Bard. Who really knows ?
:And yes, the "No May Sues" rule as it exists was codified to stop the "powers progression" and several other types of stories that really wouldn't fit into the PAW setting well. But really, every rule in the guide has its roots in one or more of the facets of the setting that we have opted not to reveal so people cannot try to game the system. If you had access to all of the details of the setting, well... You'd see where each and every restriction fits into the setting :)
:The "Block of Text" syndrome is actually a good one. It means that you know what you want to write and are not doing any real "self-censure" before letting the words hit the page. The solution is to perform a follow-up editing and formatting pass or two before calling the story "finished". And... An affinity for commas ? Have you seen any of the non-fiction I've written ? :)
:Finally... A PAW Quick Reference guide will be handy. I've thought about doing it myself and decided not to - so I could focus on other projects (Like all of my works that are "on hiatus"). Go for it - if you've got questions about characters, well, most of the authors are available on IRC. [[User:Oberon|Oberon]], [[User:FelixSagittarius|Felix]] and [[User:ShadowWolf|myself]] are on irc.lapinia.org (the TFNet IRC Network) in #transformations regularly. [[User:Cubist|Cubist]] and [[User:Devin|Devin]] are also regulars in #transformations, but have no fixed pattern to whether they will be there or not. And [[User:Michael Bard|Bard]] and [[User:Mr.Peaches|Mr. Peaches]] are regulars on irc.anthrochat.net (the AnthroChat IRC network) in #TheZoo, but I couldn't tell you if you'll actually see them there without spending a good span of time there and waiting for them. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 23:21, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

::A refrence guide would probably be something like the one for the Paradise settings, with the rules, important events, and character bios in seperate sections. Probably an addition to the current setting rules page. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

As the setting seems to cross a wide range of years, It would also be nice to chronicle changes to things over time. subsections including characters, settings, politics, and technology. Each page would have subsections for Established facts, and proposed advancements. That way any story in any time frame will fit in with the others, and the facts will be constant across the universe. I'll whip up a quick one soon. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 04:01, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

:I'll give you a hand where I can. But for now we ask that people not go past about 2075... Speculation is allowed, but there are some plans by some of the people that created the setting for stories in the years after 2075. Personally... I am having problems of my own with both my part in the collaboration and in writing Scott's back-story. So any plans for stories I may have that far into the future are... well... nebulous at best.
:As to your planned time-frame... If it is after 2015 then there are two groups that could be behind the "bomb drop" you are thinking about including. The "New Confederacy" and whatever government/governments have sprung up south of the Rio Grande. The NAR was formed in 2015 and has very strict rules about things like dropping bombs on neighbors and strategic allies.
:Other than that... Go for it. Your idea for the power sounds good, your idea for the story sounds good and your idea about setting up a "setting bible" for PAW is excellent. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 07:04, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

== Rough general timeline done-ish ==

Just finished up the rough general timeline. I don't want to add it to the settings page until someone who knows the universe better has had a look at it. [[PAW_General_TimeLine]].
--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 20:37, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

== Heart rate ==

I'm stealing your heart rate idea. It's mentioned in chapter 2, which is now up. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 07:08, 6 June 2009 (UTC)

== Category: fox??? ==

Any particular reason this was categorized as fox? So far, I haven't introduced any foxes. This isn't to say I won't, but at the moment it is very foxless. I'll remove the tag for now, until foxes make an appearance. Thanks for the tagging and templating. I'll figure it out eventually.--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 04:52, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

:Confusion on my part, likely. I recall another new PAW author who was writing a story and the character was a fox. Not even my memory is perfect :) -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 13:11, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

No worries, that was probably [[User:Lloyd_Brunnel|Lloyd]]. My short term memory is pretty much shot as well. I've got about three different outlines for Allan so I can remember what I'm writing about.
--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 16:29, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

::Yea, that was me. I'm awesome that way. Fear me =D --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

:::No thanks. I just fear the way my memory has been screwing up lately. :P -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 23:50, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

:::: Aww... --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

== grr, arrg ==

With the new chapter done,chapter 4, I'm nearing the end of my planned out storyline. I think I might need some help with the military section. Even though he's going into inteligence, he'd still have to go through boot camp. Not to mention get used to a leg prosthetic. Any help y'all can supply during this section is greatly appreciated. I'm not looking forward to writing about military action as my knowledge of such things is limited to Call of Duty 4 and Saving Private Ryan. Also let me know your thoughts on what's done so far, So I can fix things before I get too far into it. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 05:55, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

::I just realized that my openOffice document has now reached 8 pages long. I never thought that I'd get this far, nor write this much. I, for one, am amazed. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 06:07, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

::Just hit 14 pages. (o.0)

On a side note, writing emotion is very difficult without having experienced said emotions. To quote the killers, "I've never really known anybody to die before." I don't know how a reaction to death should sound, or how a 18 year old would take it, but I tried to estimate how my responses would be to my parents death. It's not easy. :(
--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 06:13, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

:I think you're doing a pretty great job. The emotions are well conveyed. Not many people have actually stared death in the eye before, or had a loved one die in such an incident, so it's not easy to estimate the appropriate emotions. But you did a great job. Nice one! I'll be waiting for more. --[[User:WolfyDrake95|Drake]], 15:31, 25 June 2009 (+0800 GMT)

I've only been to one funeral, and it wasn't for someone I knew very well. I felt really displaced, surrounded by emotional and crying people, but unable to cry for someone I hardly knew. The only death I've cried at was when our 14 year old dog died in California, and even then, I had to be alone. I'll try and write some more before the end of the week.

I forgot to say thanks for the praise. So thanks. I'm glad you thought it was decent enough. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 14:59, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

I should really not write this late at night. It can't be good for me. I also probably shouldn't write to clubbing music. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 06:19, 10 July 2009 (UTC)

== Comments ==
You might want to specify that the 'Toyota' you mention is not the big Japanese conglomerate, but what has been rebuilt from 'Toyota Motors NA'. As of 2050 contact with Japan and the orient is spotty at best. While leaving the world outside of North America to the people from those regions to specify I'd say that in China there was a societal collapse as the government lost control when the Teefers appeared. Japan would have declared them Demons - possibly even declaring some 'Oni' - and saw a fall back towards the feudal pattern. Combined with their love of high tech it's possible that they are much like a Cyberpunk vision of the Shogunate period. At the same time they are not adverse to outside contact - but need time to get used to actually contacting the world at large instead of being the ones contacted.

It goes even deeper, though, with other sections of the world seeing similar pushes backwards... In Australia it is likely that the "Indigenous Australians" would view the coming of TFOR and the appearance of Teefers as a "return of the dreaming". Ireland would likely see it as a return of the fair folk with their land returning to the place of wonder it once was. The Cymry (Welsh) might have a similar response, though I cannot see the staid and predictable English responding that way. The list goes on and on like this... In fact, the setting was designed by doing some projections about how various groups would respond to the situation. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 21:09, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

:China does have a habit of closing it's doors anytime something big goes down. Japan as well has a sort of xenophobia about it. Their folklore is also convoluted, so different teefers would be seen as different things. [[Wikipedia:Japanese Folklore|Japanese Folklore]] is full of mystical creatures. Gods and Demons are only some of it. I do like the idea of a steampunk/cyberpunk feudalism age. Those are two of my favorite genres. I just want to see a jaguar morph samurai with a steam powered beam katana.(technically you could call a fuel cell steam powered). Now I like the idea of different world theaters seeing teefers as different things, but in this modern age almost everyone would get back on track in a few dozen years. so by about 2030-50ish I'd think everyone would know it was caused by a seemingly random viral infection. That still leaves me in the middle of the "dark ages" so to speak, so I'll need a new engineering company to make my prosthesis heel and ankle joints. Possibly something German.

:Wait, Toyota's truck labs are in Texas, and they have several other north American fabs. They call it [[Wikipedia:Toyota Motor Engineering & Manufacturing North America|Toyota Motor Engineering & Manufacturing North America]]. It appears to be a major R&D and engineering facility. If it split off and became it's own entity durring the collaps, there could be two different Toyotas. Could this be canon to Pig and Whistle? If so, I'll add the relevant info to my story and the technology timeline. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 21:40, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

::Some of the world would get back on track that fast. But... There is the problem that some regions - a large number of them - wouldn't. Simply because they rely on having the existing infrastructure in place to support the populace. In England a large number of people "live on the dole" and when the economy collapses because of the worldwide societal collapse, the 'Dole' would go with it. This would happen across Europe, since most of Europe has socialist underpinnings to their societies - where the government runs a lot of the infrastructure and supports people - any collapse would take much longer to recover from. In addition to that there are limited resources available for the rebuilding in Europe - with most European countries unable to produce the goods needed to recover on their own.

::But yes - as I said - the classic Japanese conglomerate "Toyota" would not be available to the 'occidental world' for quite a span of time. Their North American branch would split itself off as a separate entity to continue operations. And since they do have a big research facility in Texas - as you noted - it would be part of that split and become a part of the new "Toyota Motors NA" (or whatever they decide to call themselves). -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 22:06, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

:Seems like we're building this world one brick at a time. I like how our progressions are through the talk pages. I wouldn't have thought that a wiki would be a good story archive, but these talk pages are extremely useful. I'll add the new info to the tech list and my story very late tonight. That's when I get most of my stuff done anyways.--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 02:54, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

::It really is no different from e-mail exchanges on mailing lists. The difference is that this is public, fully archived by independent means and anyone can jump in at any time without it being a "social taboo".

::But... You are correct. What I have been trying to do is ask questions that the authors of PAW stories might not have thought about. That creates solutions for me that I can take to the authors to help them (hopefully) improve their stories. Right now it seems to mostly take the form of having to ask about things relating to the canon - but in the future I hope to get it much more expansive. In this case the question was "Wait, Toyota? Well, if there is stuff coming from Toyota, it isn't coming out of Japan, let's mention this."

::The rest of the bits are pure speculation based on available information about the cultures of those regions and how those cultures would respond. In the case of Japan the whole "westernization" started after they were forced to open their borders. This basically broke the shogunate and gave the Emperor back full control. And Meiji ran with it - forcing Japan to "westernize" at the cost of their classic culture. Quite a lot of their martial arts was nearly lost because of the destruction of the Samurai class and their unique identity was also almost lost as they fought to get on competitive footings with the rest of the world. My speculation about them collapsing back to feudalism with cyberpunk-like leanings is lifted from their own popular media - it might not be accurate, but it isn't based on limited information (or my own wishes).

::The "Indigenous Australians" have retained a lot of their own culture and identity - a lot more than most other Aboriginal peoples living in regions where Europeans colonized - and their beliefs encompass enough that Teefers and the Torch would fit in well. Native American peoples would have a similar reaction and I can see them either reclaiming lands they were forced off of by the US Government or completely closing the reservations and regressing to their old ways of living. Both are equally possible and I am in no position to declare what has happened with them - nor would I like for anyone but members of the Native American tribes to write about such.

::I could go on and on about this - because at one point I had pushed to have a lot of this stuff included in the actual setting description. But the others involved in the design process argued successfully that defining a lot of this would not be in the best interests of the setting. At this point I agree - because we leave a lot of stuff undefined that can be defined in the future by someone joining the setting. As it stands... By 2100 the world will almost be back to a fully functional whole. There will still be areas that are "out of contact", but by the time the next century rolls around the "global village" will have gotten back on track. (But please, don't go past 2050 or so in stories - the creators of the setting have plans for the post-2050 timeline that they'd like to get written first) -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 03:39, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

== On Cultural Responses ==

In response to the above discussion, would it be safe to say that the more modernized a country is, the more likely that region's reaction to TFOR will be like the U.S/Canada's? --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

:The more "west" they are, really. If they have strong traditions of magic and magic creatures - like Japan and most Asian countries - that will strongly color their response to TFOR. In the Occidental world most countries are "too advanced" to "fall" like that - but their political and societal structures '''''will''''' affect their response. So, like I've previously said, we purposefully did not define how the rest of the world responded - only that the Canadian 'takeover' brought stability back faster than most of the world responded. That the stability rose out of Canada was a direct nod to the actual and perceived stability of the Canadian government and society - and to the very realist and non-reactionary nature of the Canadian populace.

:The US collapsed entirely because of all the power being centralized and the public not having any real trust for the government. It was helped by the survivalists using TFOR as the [http://acronyms.thefreedictionary.com/SHTF "SHTF Event"] (see the second definition). The various racist groups, separatist groups and idiots that believe the government has failed also help in the collapse. Basically... The cultured "reactionary" nature of the US Populace and the widespread prevalence of people looking for a reason to declare their properties sovereign states are what caused the US to fracture as bad as it did.

:In Europe the collapse was as bad - or worse - for other reasons. The very strong central governments combined with the very strong traditions of personal freedom combined to cause a "firestorm" of wars and rebellions to spread across the continent. Those countries with strong socialist traditions also had large collapses because of the government no longer being able to run large public welfare systems after the collapse of the global economy. Those countries with extant monarchies - whether constitutional or absolute - would likely see fast recovery of the country, but the economic collapse would make getting back into contact with the rest of the world untenable for a long period.

:In all it isn't "how modern" a country is that controls the response. What controls it is the general education level of the populace, cultural traditions, societal traditions, etc... There are dozens of different factors that would control the collapse. What happened with the US - and what led to the creation of the NAR - is actually an outlier - ie: it was not the most likely course of events, but one of the least likely. The choice was made so that the setting was visibly different from the world as it is - mostly to force authors into understanding, at a visceral level, that it is a different world and that the collapse is over.

:The "Limited Contact" bit is similar to that... But that was done as a nod to the singular truth that the world would not recover from a societal collapse that spans nations all at the same time. It's quite possible that there are countries in Europe that recovered long before the NAR was done being born and have simply chosen to cut themselves off from the world - similar to what Japan had done for centuries. But I refuse to say whether that has or has not happened - just as I refuse to say what has happened anywhere outside the NAR. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 19:03, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

== A quick question ==

How do y'all feel about a symbiotic teefer? As in he/she would have to be attached to a host organism to survive? It's just an idea that popped into my head recently. I've started grabbing random books to read again, and this caught my eye: [[http://www.iblist.com/book26842.htm Dragon and Thief]]. A symbiotic teefer may be a large part of my short a bit later, So I wanted to get y'alls opinions before I get to far with it. I'll be making a character sheet for him, and researching biology and figuring out how he would converse with the host, and all that good stuff. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 16:39, 21 June 2009 (UTC)

:A number of organisms either require a symbiotic/parasitic relationship to survive or can sometimes enter one. So long as you don't produce something along the lines of ''Alien'' I think you'll be in the clear. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

That was the idea. Allan stumbles upon someone who is dying, and the only way to save him is if Allan allows the symbiont to bond to him. There's more to it, but I don't want to spoil my story in the talk pages. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 18:15, 21 June 2009 (UTC)

:You may want to take into account his phasing ability if that's the case. As interesting as a symbiote would be, I would assume others might not be able to handle phasing the way Allan can. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

I'd have to work that out. Also if the symbiont can take the accelerated heart rate. I've also then got the problem of a character with two powers, or at the least, two personalities in one body. I'll work it over and see if I can get it to work. Maybe the symbiont can help control his heart rate and shifting, making it easier on Allan. I was thinking the symbiont would manifest as a sort of hardened biological armor. Possibly replacing Allan's missing leg when not in use as armor. All this will take much thought. Especially how to deal with the symbiont being fully sentient. I can't treat it like an object, but as a person who chose to bond with Allan. I'm glad I chose first person for the narrative, because an internal conversation would be very odd in third person. Thanks for the ideas. I'll see if I can come up with some for your story. Maybe Johnas would be a good recipient of the symbiont...

:I'd need more information before I would consider involving Jonas with a symbiote. The problem with this is that in the real world, symbiotes are more of a relationship (such as tikbirds eating pesky bugs or dead skin) than an actual species. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

Yeah, and what I have in mind is infinitely more intimate. As in, the symbiote cannot survive without a host, and after bonding, removal of the symbiont would be fatal to the host. I was thinking of a a relationship such as taking over for a bodily function, like bacteria in your intestines. Only much more complex, and with much more important functions. Such as replacing the heart, other organs, or a limb. Along with secondary external changes, such as the bio Armor. The more I think of it, the less it sounds like it would fit in with Jonas. Which makes me want it to happen to him more and more.--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 16:40, 22 June 2009 (UTC)

:Jonas would enter into such a relationship if there was a distinct benefit to be had or if a logical argument were made. On a more meta note, I would also need to know what species this symbiote teefer became blended with. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

::It doesn't need to be any identifiable species. Remember that the rules do actually state that the transformation does not just include species found on Earth. There is no evidence (might I just say 'yet' - as a way of disclaiming any future story that might contradict me) that the cause of the Torch and TFOR is not terrestrial in origin but it does not seem to be limited to species that exist on Earth. (Oh, and sorry for not chiming in later - I was at the [[TSA-Bash|Bash]] and that consumed all of my time :P) -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 18:56, 22 June 2009 (UTC)

:::True enough I suppose, but it would still have to be within reasonable bounds. Hope you enjoyed the Bash by the way. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

I haven't figured out anything yet. Much research will be needing done, and this is farther down the line in the story. I'm now thinking something along the lines of [[Wikipedia:Creature Tech|Creature Tech]], a graphic novel by Doug TenNaple. As we already have a [[User:Mr.Peaches/Have_You_Heard_About_the_TFORs%3F|dragon]] in the universe, aliens can't be far behind. I think I might be putting too much into my first foray with writing, but if it works out that'd be great. I also hope that you had fun at the Bash. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 19:29, 22 June 2009 (UTC)

== Nitpicking and Praise ==

I'll start with the nitpicking - you've broken a few grammatical rules involving the use of capital letters. Not a real biggie, but it did stand out to me.

And now for the praise… For a first effort this story shows an understanding of writing that is pretty deep. When you've got it done I'll go over it with an eye on style and deeper concerns - like I've done for one of [[User:WolfyDrake95|Wolfy Drake's]]. But as it stands, I will be adding this to [[ShadowWolfs Pack|the pack]] after you've had a chance to handle what suggestions I make.

Keep up the good work! -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 15:26, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

:Thanks for pointing that out. I know some of them are because I accidentally hit shift on my tiny keyboard, but the rest are just a combination of writing mostly around 2am and me being bad at grammar. My firefox spell check also decided I'm British and tries to change color to colour and other o->ou things.

:Thanks for the praise. I'm an avid reader, so I know how good writing is supposed to sound. Like someone who can't read sheet music can play an instrument, I just try and emulate the resulting flow and sound. SAT prep might have helped a bit, but really I think it's just from reading to darn much. What I do actively try to avoid is starting every sentence the same way. Even that is failing a bit, as I've used the same gag about three times. You know, where I say something, and then say "Or where it should have been." I'll need to patch that up with a new phrase. Either way, I extend a pre-emptive thanks for including me in the Pack. I'm very glad to be sitting in a collection with much more experienced writers.--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 15:58, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

''"The computer beeps in response, confirming that it has made acquaintances with the leg, and would like to get to know it better. I offer that it should by him a drink, and click ok on the dialog box."'' Love this line. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

:Thanks. I might even have it where Allan has modified his OS to where the dialog boxes actually say this. I would find that hilarious in real life. And if you want to copy files, It would ask permission to "Get it on." --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 20:57, 27 June 2009 (UTC)

::I've actually done similar with MS-DOS back in the day - actually going in with a hex-editor and changing the default strings. There are some programs that let you do this for various windows programs, but you have to know where the resources are stored and such. Personally... I prefer the default prompts, because then I can ignore them easily. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 21:09, 27 June 2009 (UTC)

== on prosthesis ==

At the point in the story I am now, the year is 2022 or so, and I was wondering if prosthetics have come far enough by this point to be directly connected to major nerves, or if it would be some other method of control. Let me know y'alls thoughts on the matter. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 20:49, 3 July 2009 (UTC)

::The PAW collab features some rather futuristic prosthetics and is set at around 2032. Maybe you could check it over and make some assumptions? --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

Good idea. I'll also do a little research on current technology projections. I was thinking of having a universal prosthesis connection base on the leg, that way different parts can be swapped in and out from different makers, but I needed to know how the base connection would be made. As it stands, I'm thinking basic nerve to electrode connections, and grafting into the exposed bone. I'm just not sure I want it to be all "[http://laugh.sub.jp/archives/images/fullmetal_alchemist.jpg FullMetal Alchemist]" automail style. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 23:20, 3 July 2009 (UTC)

:IIRC, the prosthesis in the [[PAW Collab]] are relatively new (within the past five years) and use implanted "connection" sockets. Prior to that they were likely a cross of the current "automatic action" prosthesis and "remaining nerve and muscle function" implementations. In this case you could have the original ones he gets be very advanced versions of the above noted cross-pollination and move to the "direct neural connection" variety by the early 2030's. I'd have to check with [[User:Devin|Devin]] to be exactly certain what he was going with for Sue, but I think my memory is correct here... -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 04:47, 4 July 2009 (UTC)

After a bit of research, I realized it doesn't actually matter much to Allan. He has a [[Wikipedia:Transtibial|Transtibial]] prosthesis, so the part which would need the most processing and technology, which is the knee joint, isn't applicable. I think I'll make it connect to left over muscle tissue, for the gait recognition, but have the rest be reactive. The foot will be modeled after this: [http://www.endolite.com/foot_echelon.php Echelon Foot], but with the Toyota Engineering ankle joint, which will allow for better rotation, shock absorption, and energy transfer. With each step the heel joint compresses with some energy going to the rebound and the rest going into storage, and subtle recharging. Even if the leg should loose power, it can be used in a reactive way. I'll have to rethink the weight of the prosthesis. 20-40lbs sounds like way too much. Anyone know how much a human leg weighs? --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 23:38, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

:Your legs are ~a third of your body's total weight. So take your weight and divide by three. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

 Just found this link, [http://www.netwellness.org/question.cfm/43046.htm Weight of amputated leg for 150lbs]. It says about 10%, or 15lbs. Allan is probably about 120lbs right now, due to hospitalization, and only the bottom half of his leg is missing, so about 4-5 lbs for the less muscled part. In all, I'd probably say the prosthesis weighs about 6-8 lbs. Thanks for the help researching. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 03:28, 11 July 2009 (UTC)

== Citations and stuff ==

:I couldn't write the phrase "tear smuggling" without giving credit to the Deepspace5 song "Life is" from which I stole it. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 01:13, 11 July 2009 (UTC)

== exposititory additions ==

I think I'm going to have to go through and add a lot of expository parts, to explain the setting and things for new readers. Not sure exactly where I should put it. I'm thinking of spacing it out throughout the whole piece, to avoid an info dump, but I don't know exactly what I need to explain. Some ideas:

*Toyota Engineering Texas
*TFOR
*Blowtorch Fever
*How Allan got a new house
*Texas splitting off
*Texas Rangers
*Technology stuff. (possibly tone down what I have already).

Let me know what y'all think. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 05:31, 14 July 2009 (UTC)

:One of the advantages to a shared setting is that you can assume your reader knows certain things about the story world. For the PAW setting, you can assume that the reader knows what TFOR and the Torch are, so there's no need to explain those. Going a bit into Texas splitting off would be a good idea, as it's still a little hazy why certain parts of the US would cede and give up access to federal support and agencies (like the CDC in the middle of a virus outbreak). I'm not a tech person so someone else will have to give input on your info exposition in that regard. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

::Texas broke off after the federal government collapsed. It was a reaction similar to what happened across the rest of the CONUS and what led to the disjointed nature that helped the NAR get born. Canada initially invaded to stabilize its borders and to stop the fighting that was going on in the US at the time from spilling over the border. Texas itself, in this case, has it's classic borders with the US on one side, but there are places on the other side where it extends into what was Mexico. (Yes, it "absorbed" some cities that were basically the Mexican half of cities that were split by the Rio Grande). -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 18:55, 14 July 2009 (UTC)

I'll add in some Texas stuff for sure. World building and all that. One of my friends went over it for grammar and such, so I'll have those fixes in soon. He also wants to add vampyre clans to the setting, possibly in Europe. I couldn't figure out how to pull that off, but it seems like a mutation of the TFOR virus could work. Possibly even an earlier permutation than the airborne one. Causing specific changes in those infected so as to transmit through blood. After I get his edits in, I'm open to anything y'all find to fix. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 20:53, 14 July 2009 (UTC)

:On a purely technical level, a vampire is possible if a person was blended with just the right amount of vampire bat, but allowing a transmission through blood would be a very, very bad idea. Vampire stories are fine and all, but I'm not sure that PAW is the right setting for it. On another note, what does CONUS stand for? --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

::PAW was designed to allow for all kinds of shit like that, but I'd recommend against traditional vampires of any sort. The cause of TFOR is not known—not as of the "current" in the setting, and not for any of the currently "open" time periods—but it does not mutate in this manner. However, as is indicated in the current setting description the forms that the "blending" covers are almost infinitely varied and do not appear to be limited to creatures from Earth.
::It could be that the "vampires" are similar to those seen in "Underworld" (or possibly "Forever Night" or "Moonlit")—that is that the vampires are faster, stronger, etc… They can require blood, have allergic reactions to silver, be photophobic, etc… Simple fact is that they can resemble classic vampires, but cannot actually be classic vampires. No changing into bats, no weakness to religious symbols, etc…
::Deviation from that would go outside the settings rules. I could go into great detail over the "why" of the restrictions I've just listed—over all of the restrictions of the setting period. But those things are in that section of the setting reserved for the "creators", with lots of other things. Perhaps when we get some of the much later stories in the setting written—those post 2070 or so—I'll be able to give you more details. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 22:33, 14 July 2009 (UTC)

I believe he had plans for modern vampyres. Biting doesn't transmit the infection, only injection/ingestion of infected blood does. They would be more culturally vampyric. No turning into bats or any of that. I think underworld would be a good basis, as well as [[Wikipedia:Peeps (novel)|Peeps]], were vampyres are driven by a parasitic something or other. He wouldn't want to force vampyres into the confines of the universe, but if it can work, he might be interested. He has a partially rp'd out storyline done. On a side note, I too would like to know what CONUS stands for. --[[Special:Contributions/99.179.100.78|99.179.100.78]] 22:48, 14 July 2009 (UTC)

Talk:Rebuilding

2009-07-14T20:51:56Z

99.179.100.78: /* exposititory additions */

__TOC__

An interesting concept, but you should know one of the things which led to the deterioration of the Blind Pig setting was people pushing the 'powers' concept too far, especially in regards to inanimorphs. While a power like the one your character has can be canon if it at least has a seemingly plausible explanation, it is best to impose some sort of limit such as energy expenditure/conditions/time required. In Allan's case it could be linked to his heartbeat, requiring either complete calm or hyperactivity. This is, of course, just an example, but consequences or costs should be considered. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

:Thank you Lloyd. I was trying to figure out a way to say this and you managed to do it for me.
:Yes - there needs to be a real, physically measurable limit. You '''''CAN''''' have things like this power - it just needs to have some limits. As it says on the [[Pig and Whistle|setting page]] there are certain [[Pig and Whistle#Caveats|caveats]] to the really funky powers. For instance, my character 'Scott' can toss around balls of superheated plasma - but the number and/or power of them is strictly limited and if he uses too many of them or ones of too high a power, the requirements could kill him.
:I like the idea of this power, but just want to ask you to be careful with how you use it so that the setting doesn't get into the territory of the "super-powerful beings that do nothing" that has happened to the Blind Pig setting. Yes - I probably contributed to that with my character "Max Grant" - but that story was done to try and point out that the "great power, great responsibility" bit from Spiderman isn't something the average joe would think about. (In truth, it had its genesis from a line of Sue Carters in the "One Small Step" epic by [[User:Michael Bard|Bard]] and [[User:Cubist|Cubist]], but I'm allowed to put multiple levels of meaning into a story, right?)
:Anyway... You seem to be doing well with this first attempt at weaving a narrative. When you've finished with it, I will try to give you some good, constructive criticism and advice on how to make it better (if you want it). -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 19:28, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

Which is why the "no Mary Sues" rule exists, right? When writing it, I had the PAW guide open in another tab for quick reference. It's in a very early stage right now. As in, what you see on the page there is whatever I could crap out from 11:00 to 3:40 that night. I'm just now getting a full idea for what Allan can and can't do. After reading through it once again, I realize that I need to fix a few things. I'm hoping to build a story arc based out of the Republic of Texas. Specifically a small town that gets bombed when a fighter pilot decides that dropping his surplus bombs would be a great idea. Allan will have to choose to help rebuild the town, or Enlist with the rangers to go after the party responsible. The setting, If my timeline is correct, is about 2020ish, when the fighting should be nearing it's end. I don't know what faction the pilot belongs to, but that will be an important choice. Anyways, I don't want to accidentally wreck your carefully crafted world with my bad fanfiction.
:Speaking of "One Small Step," was that ever finished? It feels like Several of the Jubatus storylines just kinda frayed off at the ends. I really enjoyed that piece, as well as most everything else [[User:Michael Bard|Bard]] and [[User:Cubist|Cubist]] have written. That's the main reason I found this website. I was searching for more of Cubists work, and it led me here. Both of their writings on world building and character development have helped me a lot. Cubist even has an [http://www.anthrozine.com/edit/edt.long.0a.html editorial] on Power characters.

I'll come up with a complete history for Allan soon enough, almost like a D&D character sheet. Complete with sudophysics to explain powers and limitations. Right now I need to fix the "Block of Text" syndrome that plagues my work. That, and my unnatural affinity for commas, is going to be the end of me. I gladly accept any form of criticism that you wish to hand out. Constructive, Destructive, Obstructive. Anything to make a better story. Thanks to both of you for reading and responding to this so soon.

I'm also trying to create a PAW quick reference guide from the full PAW guidebook and stories that are currently in production. Hopefully It'll help keep everything straight between stories, as well as help starting authors like me delve into the universe.
--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 21:56, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

:I've never been able to get a straight answer out of [[User:Cubist|Cubist]] or [[User:Michael Bard|Bard]] about "One Small Step". Bard says that Cubist is the one holding up the story, Cubist says that it is Bard. Who really knows ?
:And yes, the "No May Sues" rule as it exists was codified to stop the "powers progression" and several other types of stories that really wouldn't fit into the PAW setting well. But really, every rule in the guide has its roots in one or more of the facets of the setting that we have opted not to reveal so people cannot try to game the system. If you had access to all of the details of the setting, well... You'd see where each and every restriction fits into the setting :)
:The "Block of Text" syndrome is actually a good one. It means that you know what you want to write and are not doing any real "self-censure" before letting the words hit the page. The solution is to perform a follow-up editing and formatting pass or two before calling the story "finished". And... An affinity for commas ? Have you seen any of the non-fiction I've written ? :)
:Finally... A PAW Quick Reference guide will be handy. I've thought about doing it myself and decided not to - so I could focus on other projects (Like all of my works that are "on hiatus"). Go for it - if you've got questions about characters, well, most of the authors are available on IRC. [[User:Oberon|Oberon]], [[User:FelixSagittarius|Felix]] and [[User:ShadowWolf|myself]] are on irc.lapinia.org (the TFNet IRC Network) in #transformations regularly. [[User:Cubist|Cubist]] and [[User:Devin|Devin]] are also regulars in #transformations, but have no fixed pattern to whether they will be there or not. And [[User:Michael Bard|Bard]] and [[User:Mr.Peaches|Mr. Peaches]] are regulars on irc.anthrochat.net (the AnthroChat IRC network) in #TheZoo, but I couldn't tell you if you'll actually see them there without spending a good span of time there and waiting for them. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 23:21, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

::A refrence guide would probably be something like the one for the Paradise settings, with the rules, important events, and character bios in seperate sections. Probably an addition to the current setting rules page. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

As the setting seems to cross a wide range of years, It would also be nice to chronicle changes to things over time. subsections including characters, settings, politics, and technology. Each page would have subsections for Established facts, and proposed advancements. That way any story in any time frame will fit in with the others, and the facts will be constant across the universe. I'll whip up a quick one soon. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 04:01, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

:I'll give you a hand where I can. But for now we ask that people not go past about 2075... Speculation is allowed, but there are some plans by some of the people that created the setting for stories in the years after 2075. Personally... I am having problems of my own with both my part in the collaboration and in writing Scott's back-story. So any plans for stories I may have that far into the future are... well... nebulous at best.
:As to your planned time-frame... If it is after 2015 then there are two groups that could be behind the "bomb drop" you are thinking about including. The "New Confederacy" and whatever government/governments have sprung up south of the Rio Grande. The NAR was formed in 2015 and has very strict rules about things like dropping bombs on neighbors and strategic allies.
:Other than that... Go for it. Your idea for the power sounds good, your idea for the story sounds good and your idea about setting up a "setting bible" for PAW is excellent. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 07:04, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

== Rough general timeline done-ish ==

Just finished up the rough general timeline. I don't want to add it to the settings page until someone who knows the universe better has had a look at it. [[PAW_General_TimeLine]].
--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 20:37, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

== Heart rate ==

I'm stealing your heart rate idea. It's mentioned in chapter 2, which is now up. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 07:08, 6 June 2009 (UTC)

== Category: fox??? ==

Any particular reason this was categorized as fox? So far, I haven't introduced any foxes. This isn't to say I won't, but at the moment it is very foxless. I'll remove the tag for now, until foxes make an appearance. Thanks for the tagging and templating. I'll figure it out eventually.--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 04:52, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

:Confusion on my part, likely. I recall another new PAW author who was writing a story and the character was a fox. Not even my memory is perfect :) -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 13:11, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

No worries, that was probably [[User:Lloyd_Brunnel|Lloyd]]. My short term memory is pretty much shot as well. I've got about three different outlines for Allan so I can remember what I'm writing about.
--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 16:29, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

::Yea, that was me. I'm awesome that way. Fear me =D --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

:::No thanks. I just fear the way my memory has been screwing up lately. :P -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 23:50, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

:::: Aww... --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

== grr, arrg ==

With the new chapter done,chapter 4, I'm nearing the end of my planned out storyline. I think I might need some help with the military section. Even though he's going into inteligence, he'd still have to go through boot camp. Not to mention get used to a leg prosthetic. Any help y'all can supply during this section is greatly appreciated. I'm not looking forward to writing about military action as my knowledge of such things is limited to Call of Duty 4 and Saving Private Ryan. Also let me know your thoughts on what's done so far, So I can fix things before I get too far into it. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 05:55, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

::I just realized that my openOffice document has now reached 8 pages long. I never thought that I'd get this far, nor write this much. I, for one, am amazed. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 06:07, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

::Just hit 14 pages. (o.0)

On a side note, writing emotion is very difficult without having experienced said emotions. To quote the killers, "I've never really known anybody to die before." I don't know how a reaction to death should sound, or how a 18 year old would take it, but I tried to estimate how my responses would be to my parents death. It's not easy. :(
--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 06:13, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

:I think you're doing a pretty great job. The emotions are well conveyed. Not many people have actually stared death in the eye before, or had a loved one die in such an incident, so it's not easy to estimate the appropriate emotions. But you did a great job. Nice one! I'll be waiting for more. --[[User:WolfyDrake95|Drake]], 15:31, 25 June 2009 (+0800 GMT)

I've only been to one funeral, and it wasn't for someone I knew very well. I felt really displaced, surrounded by emotional and crying people, but unable to cry for someone I hardly knew. The only death I've cried at was when our 14 year old dog died in California, and even then, I had to be alone. I'll try and write some more before the end of the week.

I forgot to say thanks for the praise. So thanks. I'm glad you thought it was decent enough. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 14:59, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

I should really not write this late at night. It can't be good for me. I also probably shouldn't write to clubbing music. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 06:19, 10 July 2009 (UTC)

== Comments ==
You might want to specify that the 'Toyota' you mention is not the big Japanese conglomerate, but what has been rebuilt from 'Toyota Motors NA'. As of 2050 contact with Japan and the orient is spotty at best. While leaving the world outside of North America to the people from those regions to specify I'd say that in China there was a societal collapse as the government lost control when the Teefers appeared. Japan would have declared them Demons - possibly even declaring some 'Oni' - and saw a fall back towards the feudal pattern. Combined with their love of high tech it's possible that they are much like a Cyberpunk vision of the Shogunate period. At the same time they are not adverse to outside contact - but need time to get used to actually contacting the world at large instead of being the ones contacted.

It goes even deeper, though, with other sections of the world seeing similar pushes backwards... In Australia it is likely that the "Indigenous Australians" would view the coming of TFOR and the appearance of Teefers as a "return of the dreaming". Ireland would likely see it as a return of the fair folk with their land returning to the place of wonder it once was. The Cymry (Welsh) might have a similar response, though I cannot see the staid and predictable English responding that way. The list goes on and on like this... In fact, the setting was designed by doing some projections about how various groups would respond to the situation. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 21:09, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

:China does have a habit of closing it's doors anytime something big goes down. Japan as well has a sort of xenophobia about it. Their folklore is also convoluted, so different teefers would be seen as different things. [[Wikipedia:Japanese Folklore|Japanese Folklore]] is full of mystical creatures. Gods and Demons are only some of it. I do like the idea of a steampunk/cyberpunk feudalism age. Those are two of my favorite genres. I just want to see a jaguar morph samurai with a steam powered beam katana.(technically you could call a fuel cell steam powered). Now I like the idea of different world theaters seeing teefers as different things, but in this modern age almost everyone would get back on track in a few dozen years. so by about 2030-50ish I'd think everyone would know it was caused by a seemingly random viral infection. That still leaves me in the middle of the "dark ages" so to speak, so I'll need a new engineering company to make my prosthesis heel and ankle joints. Possibly something German.

:Wait, Toyota's truck labs are in Texas, and they have several other north American fabs. They call it [[Wikipedia:Toyota Motor Engineering & Manufacturing North America|Toyota Motor Engineering & Manufacturing North America]]. It appears to be a major R&D and engineering facility. If it split off and became it's own entity durring the collaps, there could be two different Toyotas. Could this be canon to Pig and Whistle? If so, I'll add the relevant info to my story and the technology timeline. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 21:40, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

::Some of the world would get back on track that fast. But... There is the problem that some regions - a large number of them - wouldn't. Simply because they rely on having the existing infrastructure in place to support the populace. In England a large number of people "live on the dole" and when the economy collapses because of the worldwide societal collapse, the 'Dole' would go with it. This would happen across Europe, since most of Europe has socialist underpinnings to their societies - where the government runs a lot of the infrastructure and supports people - any collapse would take much longer to recover from. In addition to that there are limited resources available for the rebuilding in Europe - with most European countries unable to produce the goods needed to recover on their own.

::But yes - as I said - the classic Japanese conglomerate "Toyota" would not be available to the 'occidental world' for quite a span of time. Their North American branch would split itself off as a separate entity to continue operations. And since they do have a big research facility in Texas - as you noted - it would be part of that split and become a part of the new "Toyota Motors NA" (or whatever they decide to call themselves). -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 22:06, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

:Seems like we're building this world one brick at a time. I like how our progressions are through the talk pages. I wouldn't have thought that a wiki would be a good story archive, but these talk pages are extremely useful. I'll add the new info to the tech list and my story very late tonight. That's when I get most of my stuff done anyways.--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 02:54, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

::It really is no different from e-mail exchanges on mailing lists. The difference is that this is public, fully archived by independent means and anyone can jump in at any time without it being a "social taboo".

::But... You are correct. What I have been trying to do is ask questions that the authors of PAW stories might not have thought about. That creates solutions for me that I can take to the authors to help them (hopefully) improve their stories. Right now it seems to mostly take the form of having to ask about things relating to the canon - but in the future I hope to get it much more expansive. In this case the question was "Wait, Toyota? Well, if there is stuff coming from Toyota, it isn't coming out of Japan, let's mention this."

::The rest of the bits are pure speculation based on available information about the cultures of those regions and how those cultures would respond. In the case of Japan the whole "westernization" started after they were forced to open their borders. This basically broke the shogunate and gave the Emperor back full control. And Meiji ran with it - forcing Japan to "westernize" at the cost of their classic culture. Quite a lot of their martial arts was nearly lost because of the destruction of the Samurai class and their unique identity was also almost lost as they fought to get on competitive footings with the rest of the world. My speculation about them collapsing back to feudalism with cyberpunk-like leanings is lifted from their own popular media - it might not be accurate, but it isn't based on limited information (or my own wishes).

::The "Indigenous Australians" have retained a lot of their own culture and identity - a lot more than most other Aboriginal peoples living in regions where Europeans colonized - and their beliefs encompass enough that Teefers and the Torch would fit in well. Native American peoples would have a similar reaction and I can see them either reclaiming lands they were forced off of by the US Government or completely closing the reservations and regressing to their old ways of living. Both are equally possible and I am in no position to declare what has happened with them - nor would I like for anyone but members of the Native American tribes to write about such.

::I could go on and on about this - because at one point I had pushed to have a lot of this stuff included in the actual setting description. But the others involved in the design process argued successfully that defining a lot of this would not be in the best interests of the setting. At this point I agree - because we leave a lot of stuff undefined that can be defined in the future by someone joining the setting. As it stands... By 2100 the world will almost be back to a fully functional whole. There will still be areas that are "out of contact", but by the time the next century rolls around the "global village" will have gotten back on track. (But please, don't go past 2050 or so in stories - the creators of the setting have plans for the post-2050 timeline that they'd like to get written first) -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 03:39, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

== On Cultural Responses ==

In response to the above discussion, would it be safe to say that the more modernized a country is, the more likely that region's reaction to TFOR will be like the U.S/Canada's? --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

:The more "west" they are, really. If they have strong traditions of magic and magic creatures - like Japan and most Asian countries - that will strongly color their response to TFOR. In the Occidental world most countries are "too advanced" to "fall" like that - but their political and societal structures '''''will''''' affect their response. So, like I've previously said, we purposefully did not define how the rest of the world responded - only that the Canadian 'takeover' brought stability back faster than most of the world responded. That the stability rose out of Canada was a direct nod to the actual and perceived stability of the Canadian government and society - and to the very realist and non-reactionary nature of the Canadian populace.

:The US collapsed entirely because of all the power being centralized and the public not having any real trust for the government. It was helped by the survivalists using TFOR as the [http://acronyms.thefreedictionary.com/SHTF "SHTF Event"] (see the second definition). The various racist groups, separatist groups and idiots that believe the government has failed also help in the collapse. Basically... The cultured "reactionary" nature of the US Populace and the widespread prevalence of people looking for a reason to declare their properties sovereign states are what caused the US to fracture as bad as it did.

:In Europe the collapse was as bad - or worse - for other reasons. The very strong central governments combined with the very strong traditions of personal freedom combined to cause a "firestorm" of wars and rebellions to spread across the continent. Those countries with strong socialist traditions also had large collapses because of the government no longer being able to run large public welfare systems after the collapse of the global economy. Those countries with extant monarchies - whether constitutional or absolute - would likely see fast recovery of the country, but the economic collapse would make getting back into contact with the rest of the world untenable for a long period.

:In all it isn't "how modern" a country is that controls the response. What controls it is the general education level of the populace, cultural traditions, societal traditions, etc... There are dozens of different factors that would control the collapse. What happened with the US - and what led to the creation of the NAR - is actually an outlier - ie: it was not the most likely course of events, but one of the least likely. The choice was made so that the setting was visibly different from the world as it is - mostly to force authors into understanding, at a visceral level, that it is a different world and that the collapse is over.

:The "Limited Contact" bit is similar to that... But that was done as a nod to the singular truth that the world would not recover from a societal collapse that spans nations all at the same time. It's quite possible that there are countries in Europe that recovered long before the NAR was done being born and have simply chosen to cut themselves off from the world - similar to what Japan had done for centuries. But I refuse to say whether that has or has not happened - just as I refuse to say what has happened anywhere outside the NAR. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 19:03, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

== A quick question ==

How do y'all feel about a symbiotic teefer? As in he/she would have to be attached to a host organism to survive? It's just an idea that popped into my head recently. I've started grabbing random books to read again, and this caught my eye: [[http://www.iblist.com/book26842.htm Dragon and Thief]]. A symbiotic teefer may be a large part of my short a bit later, So I wanted to get y'alls opinions before I get to far with it. I'll be making a character sheet for him, and researching biology and figuring out how he would converse with the host, and all that good stuff. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 16:39, 21 June 2009 (UTC)

:A number of organisms either require a symbiotic/parasitic relationship to survive or can sometimes enter one. So long as you don't produce something along the lines of ''Alien'' I think you'll be in the clear. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

That was the idea. Allan stumbles upon someone who is dying, and the only way to save him is if Allan allows the symbiont to bond to him. There's more to it, but I don't want to spoil my story in the talk pages. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 18:15, 21 June 2009 (UTC)

:You may want to take into account his phasing ability if that's the case. As interesting as a symbiote would be, I would assume others might not be able to handle phasing the way Allan can. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

I'd have to work that out. Also if the symbiont can take the accelerated heart rate. I've also then got the problem of a character with two powers, or at the least, two personalities in one body. I'll work it over and see if I can get it to work. Maybe the symbiont can help control his heart rate and shifting, making it easier on Allan. I was thinking the symbiont would manifest as a sort of hardened biological armor. Possibly replacing Allan's missing leg when not in use as armor. All this will take much thought. Especially how to deal with the symbiont being fully sentient. I can't treat it like an object, but as a person who chose to bond with Allan. I'm glad I chose first person for the narrative, because an internal conversation would be very odd in third person. Thanks for the ideas. I'll see if I can come up with some for your story. Maybe Johnas would be a good recipient of the symbiont...

:I'd need more information before I would consider involving Jonas with a symbiote. The problem with this is that in the real world, symbiotes are more of a relationship (such as tikbirds eating pesky bugs or dead skin) than an actual species. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

Yeah, and what I have in mind is infinitely more intimate. As in, the symbiote cannot survive without a host, and after bonding, removal of the symbiont would be fatal to the host. I was thinking of a a relationship such as taking over for a bodily function, like bacteria in your intestines. Only much more complex, and with much more important functions. Such as replacing the heart, other organs, or a limb. Along with secondary external changes, such as the bio Armor. The more I think of it, the less it sounds like it would fit in with Jonas. Which makes me want it to happen to him more and more.--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 16:40, 22 June 2009 (UTC)

:Jonas would enter into such a relationship if there was a distinct benefit to be had or if a logical argument were made. On a more meta note, I would also need to know what species this symbiote teefer became blended with. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

::It doesn't need to be any identifiable species. Remember that the rules do actually state that the transformation does not just include species found on Earth. There is no evidence (might I just say 'yet' - as a way of disclaiming any future story that might contradict me) that the cause of the Torch and TFOR is not terrestrial in origin but it does not seem to be limited to species that exist on Earth. (Oh, and sorry for not chiming in later - I was at the [[TSA-Bash|Bash]] and that consumed all of my time :P) -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 18:56, 22 June 2009 (UTC)

:::True enough I suppose, but it would still have to be within reasonable bounds. Hope you enjoyed the Bash by the way. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

I haven't figured out anything yet. Much research will be needing done, and this is farther down the line in the story. I'm now thinking something along the lines of [[Wikipedia:Creature Tech|Creature Tech]], a graphic novel by Doug TenNaple. As we already have a [[User:Mr.Peaches/Have_You_Heard_About_the_TFORs%3F|dragon]] in the universe, aliens can't be far behind. I think I might be putting too much into my first foray with writing, but if it works out that'd be great. I also hope that you had fun at the Bash. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 19:29, 22 June 2009 (UTC)

== Nitpicking and Praise ==

I'll start with the nitpicking - you've broken a few grammatical rules involving the use of capital letters. Not a real biggie, but it did stand out to me.

And now for the praise… For a first effort this story shows an understanding of writing that is pretty deep. When you've got it done I'll go over it with an eye on style and deeper concerns - like I've done for one of [[User:WolfyDrake95|Wolfy Drake's]]. But as it stands, I will be adding this to [[ShadowWolfs Pack|the pack]] after you've had a chance to handle what suggestions I make.

Keep up the good work! -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 15:26, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

:Thanks for pointing that out. I know some of them are because I accidentally hit shift on my tiny keyboard, but the rest are just a combination of writing mostly around 2am and me being bad at grammar. My firefox spell check also decided I'm British and tries to change color to colour and other o->ou things.

:Thanks for the praise. I'm an avid reader, so I know how good writing is supposed to sound. Like someone who can't read sheet music can play an instrument, I just try and emulate the resulting flow and sound. SAT prep might have helped a bit, but really I think it's just from reading to darn much. What I do actively try to avoid is starting every sentence the same way. Even that is failing a bit, as I've used the same gag about three times. You know, where I say something, and then say "Or where it should have been." I'll need to patch that up with a new phrase. Either way, I extend a pre-emptive thanks for including me in the Pack. I'm very glad to be sitting in a collection with much more experienced writers.--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 15:58, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

''"The computer beeps in response, confirming that it has made acquaintances with the leg, and would like to get to know it better. I offer that it should by him a drink, and click ok on the dialog box."'' Love this line. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

:Thanks. I might even have it where Allan has modified his OS to where the dialog boxes actually say this. I would find that hilarious in real life. And if you want to copy files, It would ask permission to "Get it on." --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 20:57, 27 June 2009 (UTC)

::I've actually done similar with MS-DOS back in the day - actually going in with a hex-editor and changing the default strings. There are some programs that let you do this for various windows programs, but you have to know where the resources are stored and such. Personally... I prefer the default prompts, because then I can ignore them easily. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 21:09, 27 June 2009 (UTC)

== on prosthesis ==

At the point in the story I am now, the year is 2022 or so, and I was wondering if prosthetics have come far enough by this point to be directly connected to major nerves, or if it would be some other method of control. Let me know y'alls thoughts on the matter. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 20:49, 3 July 2009 (UTC)

::The PAW collab features some rather futuristic prosthetics and is set at around 2032. Maybe you could check it over and make some assumptions? --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

Good idea. I'll also do a little research on current technology projections. I was thinking of having a universal prosthesis connection base on the leg, that way different parts can be swapped in and out from different makers, but I needed to know how the base connection would be made. As it stands, I'm thinking basic nerve to electrode connections, and grafting into the exposed bone. I'm just not sure I want it to be all "[http://laugh.sub.jp/archives/images/fullmetal_alchemist.jpg FullMetal Alchemist]" automail style. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 23:20, 3 July 2009 (UTC)

:IIRC, the prosthesis in the [[PAW Collab]] are relatively new (within the past five years) and use implanted "connection" sockets. Prior to that they were likely a cross of the current "automatic action" prosthesis and "remaining nerve and muscle function" implementations. In this case you could have the original ones he gets be very advanced versions of the above noted cross-pollination and move to the "direct neural connection" variety by the early 2030's. I'd have to check with [[User:Devin|Devin]] to be exactly certain what he was going with for Sue, but I think my memory is correct here... -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 04:47, 4 July 2009 (UTC)

After a bit of research, I realized it doesn't actually matter much to Allan. He has a [[Wikipedia:Transtibial|Transtibial]] prosthesis, so the part which would need the most processing and technology, which is the knee joint, isn't applicable. I think I'll make it connect to left over muscle tissue, for the gait recognition, but have the rest be reactive. The foot will be modeled after this: [http://www.endolite.com/foot_echelon.php Echelon Foot], but with the Toyota Engineering ankle joint, which will allow for better rotation, shock absorption, and energy transfer. With each step the heel joint compresses with some energy going to the rebound and the rest going into storage, and subtle recharging. Even if the leg should loose power, it can be used in a reactive way. I'll have to rethink the weight of the prosthesis. 20-40lbs sounds like way too much. Anyone know how much a human leg weighs? --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 23:38, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

:Your legs are ~a third of your body's total weight. So take your weight and divide by three. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

 Just found this link, [http://www.netwellness.org/question.cfm/43046.htm Weight of amputated leg for 150lbs]. It says about 10%, or 15lbs. Allan is probably about 120lbs right now, due to hospitalization, and only the bottom half of his leg is missing, so about 4-5 lbs for the less muscled part. In all, I'd probably say the prosthesis weighs about 6-8 lbs. Thanks for the help researching. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 03:28, 11 July 2009 (UTC)

== Citations and stuff ==

:I couldn't write the phrase "tear smuggling" without giving credit to the Deepspace5 song "Life is" from which I stole it. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 01:13, 11 July 2009 (UTC)

== exposititory additions ==

I think I'm going to have to go through and add a lot of expository parts, to explain the setting and things for new readers. Not sure exactly where I should put it. I'm thinking of spacing it out throughout the whole piece, to avoid an info dump, but I don't know exactly what I need to explain. Some ideas:

*Toyota Engineering Texas
*TFOR
*Blowtorch Fever
*How Allan got a new house
*Texas splitting off
*Texas Rangers
*Technology stuff. (possibly tone down what I have already).

Let me know what y'all think. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 05:31, 14 July 2009 (UTC)

:One of the advantages to a shared setting is that you can assume your reader knows certain things about the story world. For the PAW setting, you can assume that the reader knows what TFOR and the Torch are, so there's no need to explain those. Going a bit into Texas splitting off would be a good idea, as it's still a little hazy why certain parts of the US would cede and give up access to federal support and agencies (like the CDC in the middle of a virus outbreak). I'm not a tech person so someone else will have to give input on your info exposition in that regard. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

::Texas broke off after the federal government collapsed. It was a reaction similar to what happened across the rest of the CONUS and what led to the disjointed nature that helped the NAR get born. Canada initially invaded to stabilize its borders and to stop the fighting that was going on in the US at the time from spilling over the border. Texas itself, in this case, has it's classic borders with the US on one side, but there are places on the other side where it extends into what was Mexico. (Yes, it "absorbed" some cities that were basically the Mexican half of cities that were split by the Rio Grande). -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 18:55, 14 July 2009 (UTC)

I'll add in some Texas stuff for sure. World building and all that. One of my friends went over it for grammar and such, so I'll have those fixes in soon. He also wants to add vampyre clans to the setting, possibly in Europe. I couldn't figure out how to pull that off, but it seems like a mutation of the TFOR virus could work. Possibly even an earlier permutation than the airborne one. Causing specific changes in those infected so as to transmit through blood. After I get his edits in, I'm open to anything y'all find to fix. --[[Special:Contributions/99.179.100.78|99.179.100.78]] 20:51, 14 July 2009 (UTC)

Talk:Rebuilding

2009-07-11T03:27:58Z

99.179.100.78: /* on prosthesis */ answered, yo

__TOC__

An interesting concept, but you should know one of the things which led to the deterioration of the Blind Pig setting was people pushing the 'powers' concept too far, especially in regards to inanimorphs. While a power like the one your character has can be canon if it at least has a seemingly plausible explanation, it is best to impose some sort of limit such as energy expenditure/conditions/time required. In Allan's case it could be linked to his heartbeat, requiring either complete calm or hyperactivity. This is, of course, just an example, but consequences or costs should be considered. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

:Thank you Lloyd. I was trying to figure out a way to say this and you managed to do it for me.
:Yes - there needs to be a real, physically measurable limit. You '''''CAN''''' have things like this power - it just needs to have some limits. As it says on the [[Pig and Whistle|setting page]] there are certain [[Pig and Whistle#Caveats|caveats]] to the really funky powers. For instance, my character 'Scott' can toss around balls of superheated plasma - but the number and/or power of them is strictly limited and if he uses too many of them or ones of too high a power, the requirements could kill him.
:I like the idea of this power, but just want to ask you to be careful with how you use it so that the setting doesn't get into the territory of the "super-powerful beings that do nothing" that has happened to the Blind Pig setting. Yes - I probably contributed to that with my character "Max Grant" - but that story was done to try and point out that the "great power, great responsibility" bit from Spiderman isn't something the average joe would think about. (In truth, it had its genesis from a line of Sue Carters in the "One Small Step" epic by [[User:Michael Bard|Bard]] and [[User:Cubist|Cubist]], but I'm allowed to put multiple levels of meaning into a story, right?)
:Anyway... You seem to be doing well with this first attempt at weaving a narrative. When you've finished with it, I will try to give you some good, constructive criticism and advice on how to make it better (if you want it). -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 19:28, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

Which is why the "no Mary Sues" rule exists, right? When writing it, I had the PAW guide open in another tab for quick reference. It's in a very early stage right now. As in, what you see on the page there is whatever I could crap out from 11:00 to 3:40 that night. I'm just now getting a full idea for what Allan can and can't do. After reading through it once again, I realize that I need to fix a few things. I'm hoping to build a story arc based out of the Republic of Texas. Specifically a small town that gets bombed when a fighter pilot decides that dropping his surplus bombs would be a great idea. Allan will have to choose to help rebuild the town, or Enlist with the rangers to go after the party responsible. The setting, If my timeline is correct, is about 2020ish, when the fighting should be nearing it's end. I don't know what faction the pilot belongs to, but that will be an important choice. Anyways, I don't want to accidentally wreck your carefully crafted world with my bad fanfiction.
:Speaking of "One Small Step," was that ever finished? It feels like Several of the Jubatus storylines just kinda frayed off at the ends. I really enjoyed that piece, as well as most everything else [[User:Michael Bard|Bard]] and [[User:Cubist|Cubist]] have written. That's the main reason I found this website. I was searching for more of Cubists work, and it led me here. Both of their writings on world building and character development have helped me a lot. Cubist even has an [http://www.anthrozine.com/edit/edt.long.0a.html editorial] on Power characters.

I'll come up with a complete history for Allan soon enough, almost like a D&D character sheet. Complete with sudophysics to explain powers and limitations. Right now I need to fix the "Block of Text" syndrome that plagues my work. That, and my unnatural affinity for commas, is going to be the end of me. I gladly accept any form of criticism that you wish to hand out. Constructive, Destructive, Obstructive. Anything to make a better story. Thanks to both of you for reading and responding to this so soon.

I'm also trying to create a PAW quick reference guide from the full PAW guidebook and stories that are currently in production. Hopefully It'll help keep everything straight between stories, as well as help starting authors like me delve into the universe.
--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 21:56, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

:I've never been able to get a straight answer out of [[User:Cubist|Cubist]] or [[User:Michael Bard|Bard]] about "One Small Step". Bard says that Cubist is the one holding up the story, Cubist says that it is Bard. Who really knows ?
:And yes, the "No May Sues" rule as it exists was codified to stop the "powers progression" and several other types of stories that really wouldn't fit into the PAW setting well. But really, every rule in the guide has its roots in one or more of the facets of the setting that we have opted not to reveal so people cannot try to game the system. If you had access to all of the details of the setting, well... You'd see where each and every restriction fits into the setting :)
:The "Block of Text" syndrome is actually a good one. It means that you know what you want to write and are not doing any real "self-censure" before letting the words hit the page. The solution is to perform a follow-up editing and formatting pass or two before calling the story "finished". And... An affinity for commas ? Have you seen any of the non-fiction I've written ? :)
:Finally... A PAW Quick Reference guide will be handy. I've thought about doing it myself and decided not to - so I could focus on other projects (Like all of my works that are "on hiatus"). Go for it - if you've got questions about characters, well, most of the authors are available on IRC. [[User:Oberon|Oberon]], [[User:FelixSagittarius|Felix]] and [[User:ShadowWolf|myself]] are on irc.lapinia.org (the TFNet IRC Network) in #transformations regularly. [[User:Cubist|Cubist]] and [[User:Devin|Devin]] are also regulars in #transformations, but have no fixed pattern to whether they will be there or not. And [[User:Michael Bard|Bard]] and [[User:Mr.Peaches|Mr. Peaches]] are regulars on irc.anthrochat.net (the AnthroChat IRC network) in #TheZoo, but I couldn't tell you if you'll actually see them there without spending a good span of time there and waiting for them. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 23:21, 3 June 2009 (UTC)

::A refrence guide would probably be something like the one for the Paradise settings, with the rules, important events, and character bios in seperate sections. Probably an addition to the current setting rules page. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

As the setting seems to cross a wide range of years, It would also be nice to chronicle changes to things over time. subsections including characters, settings, politics, and technology. Each page would have subsections for Established facts, and proposed advancements. That way any story in any time frame will fit in with the others, and the facts will be constant across the universe. I'll whip up a quick one soon. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 04:01, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

:I'll give you a hand where I can. But for now we ask that people not go past about 2075... Speculation is allowed, but there are some plans by some of the people that created the setting for stories in the years after 2075. Personally... I am having problems of my own with both my part in the collaboration and in writing Scott's back-story. So any plans for stories I may have that far into the future are... well... nebulous at best.
:As to your planned time-frame... If it is after 2015 then there are two groups that could be behind the "bomb drop" you are thinking about including. The "New Confederacy" and whatever government/governments have sprung up south of the Rio Grande. The NAR was formed in 2015 and has very strict rules about things like dropping bombs on neighbors and strategic allies.
:Other than that... Go for it. Your idea for the power sounds good, your idea for the story sounds good and your idea about setting up a "setting bible" for PAW is excellent. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 07:04, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

== Rough general timeline done-ish ==

Just finished up the rough general timeline. I don't want to add it to the settings page until someone who knows the universe better has had a look at it. [[PAW_General_TimeLine]].
--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 20:37, 4 June 2009 (UTC)

== Heart rate ==

I'm stealing your heart rate idea. It's mentioned in chapter 2, which is now up. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 07:08, 6 June 2009 (UTC)

== Category: fox??? ==

Any particular reason this was categorized as fox? So far, I haven't introduced any foxes. This isn't to say I won't, but at the moment it is very foxless. I'll remove the tag for now, until foxes make an appearance. Thanks for the tagging and templating. I'll figure it out eventually.--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 04:52, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

:Confusion on my part, likely. I recall another new PAW author who was writing a story and the character was a fox. Not even my memory is perfect :) -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 13:11, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

No worries, that was probably [[User:Lloyd_Brunnel|Lloyd]]. My short term memory is pretty much shot as well. I've got about three different outlines for Allan so I can remember what I'm writing about.
--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 16:29, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

::Yea, that was me. I'm awesome that way. Fear me =D --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

:::No thanks. I just fear the way my memory has been screwing up lately. :P -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 23:50, 8 June 2009 (UTC)

:::: Aww... --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

== grr, arrg ==

With the new chapter done,chapter 4, I'm nearing the end of my planned out storyline. I think I might need some help with the military section. Even though he's going into inteligence, he'd still have to go through boot camp. Not to mention get used to a leg prosthetic. Any help y'all can supply during this section is greatly appreciated. I'm not looking forward to writing about military action as my knowledge of such things is limited to Call of Duty 4 and Saving Private Ryan. Also let me know your thoughts on what's done so far, So I can fix things before I get too far into it. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 05:55, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

::I just realized that my openOffice document has now reached 8 pages long. I never thought that I'd get this far, nor write this much. I, for one, am amazed. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 06:07, 12 June 2009 (UTC)

::Just hit 14 pages. (o.0)

On a side note, writing emotion is very difficult without having experienced said emotions. To quote the killers, "I've never really known anybody to die before." I don't know how a reaction to death should sound, or how a 18 year old would take it, but I tried to estimate how my responses would be to my parents death. It's not easy. :(
--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 06:13, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

:I think you're doing a pretty great job. The emotions are well conveyed. Not many people have actually stared death in the eye before, or had a loved one die in such an incident, so it's not easy to estimate the appropriate emotions. But you did a great job. Nice one! I'll be waiting for more. --[[User:WolfyDrake95|Drake]], 15:31, 25 June 2009 (+0800 GMT)

I've only been to one funeral, and it wasn't for someone I knew very well. I felt really displaced, surrounded by emotional and crying people, but unable to cry for someone I hardly knew. The only death I've cried at was when our 14 year old dog died in California, and even then, I had to be alone. I'll try and write some more before the end of the week.

I forgot to say thanks for the praise. So thanks. I'm glad you thought it was decent enough. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 14:59, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

I should really not write this late at night. It can't be good for me. I also probably shouldn't write to clubbing music. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 06:19, 10 July 2009 (UTC)

== Comments ==
You might want to specify that the 'Toyota' you mention is not the big Japanese conglomerate, but what has been rebuilt from 'Toyota Motors NA'. As of 2050 contact with Japan and the orient is spotty at best. While leaving the world outside of North America to the people from those regions to specify I'd say that in China there was a societal collapse as the government lost control when the Teefers appeared. Japan would have declared them Demons - possibly even declaring some 'Oni' - and saw a fall back towards the feudal pattern. Combined with their love of high tech it's possible that they are much like a Cyberpunk vision of the Shogunate period. At the same time they are not adverse to outside contact - but need time to get used to actually contacting the world at large instead of being the ones contacted.

It goes even deeper, though, with other sections of the world seeing similar pushes backwards... In Australia it is likely that the "Indigenous Australians" would view the coming of TFOR and the appearance of Teefers as a "return of the dreaming". Ireland would likely see it as a return of the fair folk with their land returning to the place of wonder it once was. The Cymry (Welsh) might have a similar response, though I cannot see the staid and predictable English responding that way. The list goes on and on like this... In fact, the setting was designed by doing some projections about how various groups would respond to the situation. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 21:09, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

:China does have a habit of closing it's doors anytime something big goes down. Japan as well has a sort of xenophobia about it. Their folklore is also convoluted, so different teefers would be seen as different things. [[Wikipedia:Japanese Folklore|Japanese Folklore]] is full of mystical creatures. Gods and Demons are only some of it. I do like the idea of a steampunk/cyberpunk feudalism age. Those are two of my favorite genres. I just want to see a jaguar morph samurai with a steam powered beam katana.(technically you could call a fuel cell steam powered). Now I like the idea of different world theaters seeing teefers as different things, but in this modern age almost everyone would get back on track in a few dozen years. so by about 2030-50ish I'd think everyone would know it was caused by a seemingly random viral infection. That still leaves me in the middle of the "dark ages" so to speak, so I'll need a new engineering company to make my prosthesis heel and ankle joints. Possibly something German.

:Wait, Toyota's truck labs are in Texas, and they have several other north American fabs. They call it [[Wikipedia:Toyota Motor Engineering & Manufacturing North America|Toyota Motor Engineering & Manufacturing North America]]. It appears to be a major R&D and engineering facility. If it split off and became it's own entity durring the collaps, there could be two different Toyotas. Could this be canon to Pig and Whistle? If so, I'll add the relevant info to my story and the technology timeline. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 21:40, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

::Some of the world would get back on track that fast. But... There is the problem that some regions - a large number of them - wouldn't. Simply because they rely on having the existing infrastructure in place to support the populace. In England a large number of people "live on the dole" and when the economy collapses because of the worldwide societal collapse, the 'Dole' would go with it. This would happen across Europe, since most of Europe has socialist underpinnings to their societies - where the government runs a lot of the infrastructure and supports people - any collapse would take much longer to recover from. In addition to that there are limited resources available for the rebuilding in Europe - with most European countries unable to produce the goods needed to recover on their own.

::But yes - as I said - the classic Japanese conglomerate "Toyota" would not be available to the 'occidental world' for quite a span of time. Their North American branch would split itself off as a separate entity to continue operations. And since they do have a big research facility in Texas - as you noted - it would be part of that split and become a part of the new "Toyota Motors NA" (or whatever they decide to call themselves). -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 22:06, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

:Seems like we're building this world one brick at a time. I like how our progressions are through the talk pages. I wouldn't have thought that a wiki would be a good story archive, but these talk pages are extremely useful. I'll add the new info to the tech list and my story very late tonight. That's when I get most of my stuff done anyways.--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 02:54, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

::It really is no different from e-mail exchanges on mailing lists. The difference is that this is public, fully archived by independent means and anyone can jump in at any time without it being a "social taboo".

::But... You are correct. What I have been trying to do is ask questions that the authors of PAW stories might not have thought about. That creates solutions for me that I can take to the authors to help them (hopefully) improve their stories. Right now it seems to mostly take the form of having to ask about things relating to the canon - but in the future I hope to get it much more expansive. In this case the question was "Wait, Toyota? Well, if there is stuff coming from Toyota, it isn't coming out of Japan, let's mention this."

::The rest of the bits are pure speculation based on available information about the cultures of those regions and how those cultures would respond. In the case of Japan the whole "westernization" started after they were forced to open their borders. This basically broke the shogunate and gave the Emperor back full control. And Meiji ran with it - forcing Japan to "westernize" at the cost of their classic culture. Quite a lot of their martial arts was nearly lost because of the destruction of the Samurai class and their unique identity was also almost lost as they fought to get on competitive footings with the rest of the world. My speculation about them collapsing back to feudalism with cyberpunk-like leanings is lifted from their own popular media - it might not be accurate, but it isn't based on limited information (or my own wishes).

::The "Indigenous Australians" have retained a lot of their own culture and identity - a lot more than most other Aboriginal peoples living in regions where Europeans colonized - and their beliefs encompass enough that Teefers and the Torch would fit in well. Native American peoples would have a similar reaction and I can see them either reclaiming lands they were forced off of by the US Government or completely closing the reservations and regressing to their old ways of living. Both are equally possible and I am in no position to declare what has happened with them - nor would I like for anyone but members of the Native American tribes to write about such.

::I could go on and on about this - because at one point I had pushed to have a lot of this stuff included in the actual setting description. But the others involved in the design process argued successfully that defining a lot of this would not be in the best interests of the setting. At this point I agree - because we leave a lot of stuff undefined that can be defined in the future by someone joining the setting. As it stands... By 2100 the world will almost be back to a fully functional whole. There will still be areas that are "out of contact", but by the time the next century rolls around the "global village" will have gotten back on track. (But please, don't go past 2050 or so in stories - the creators of the setting have plans for the post-2050 timeline that they'd like to get written first) -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 03:39, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

== On Cultural Responses ==

In response to the above discussion, would it be safe to say that the more modernized a country is, the more likely that region's reaction to TFOR will be like the U.S/Canada's? --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

:The more "west" they are, really. If they have strong traditions of magic and magic creatures - like Japan and most Asian countries - that will strongly color their response to TFOR. In the Occidental world most countries are "too advanced" to "fall" like that - but their political and societal structures '''''will''''' affect their response. So, like I've previously said, we purposefully did not define how the rest of the world responded - only that the Canadian 'takeover' brought stability back faster than most of the world responded. That the stability rose out of Canada was a direct nod to the actual and perceived stability of the Canadian government and society - and to the very realist and non-reactionary nature of the Canadian populace.

:The US collapsed entirely because of all the power being centralized and the public not having any real trust for the government. It was helped by the survivalists using TFOR as the [http://acronyms.thefreedictionary.com/SHTF "SHTF Event"] (see the second definition). The various racist groups, separatist groups and idiots that believe the government has failed also help in the collapse. Basically... The cultured "reactionary" nature of the US Populace and the widespread prevalence of people looking for a reason to declare their properties sovereign states are what caused the US to fracture as bad as it did.

:In Europe the collapse was as bad - or worse - for other reasons. The very strong central governments combined with the very strong traditions of personal freedom combined to cause a "firestorm" of wars and rebellions to spread across the continent. Those countries with strong socialist traditions also had large collapses because of the government no longer being able to run large public welfare systems after the collapse of the global economy. Those countries with extant monarchies - whether constitutional or absolute - would likely see fast recovery of the country, but the economic collapse would make getting back into contact with the rest of the world untenable for a long period.

:In all it isn't "how modern" a country is that controls the response. What controls it is the general education level of the populace, cultural traditions, societal traditions, etc... There are dozens of different factors that would control the collapse. What happened with the US - and what led to the creation of the NAR - is actually an outlier - ie: it was not the most likely course of events, but one of the least likely. The choice was made so that the setting was visibly different from the world as it is - mostly to force authors into understanding, at a visceral level, that it is a different world and that the collapse is over.

:The "Limited Contact" bit is similar to that... But that was done as a nod to the singular truth that the world would not recover from a societal collapse that spans nations all at the same time. It's quite possible that there are countries in Europe that recovered long before the NAR was done being born and have simply chosen to cut themselves off from the world - similar to what Japan had done for centuries. But I refuse to say whether that has or has not happened - just as I refuse to say what has happened anywhere outside the NAR. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 19:03, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

== A quick question ==

How do y'all feel about a symbiotic teefer? As in he/she would have to be attached to a host organism to survive? It's just an idea that popped into my head recently. I've started grabbing random books to read again, and this caught my eye: [[http://www.iblist.com/book26842.htm Dragon and Thief]]. A symbiotic teefer may be a large part of my short a bit later, So I wanted to get y'alls opinions before I get to far with it. I'll be making a character sheet for him, and researching biology and figuring out how he would converse with the host, and all that good stuff. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 16:39, 21 June 2009 (UTC)

:A number of organisms either require a symbiotic/parasitic relationship to survive or can sometimes enter one. So long as you don't produce something along the lines of ''Alien'' I think you'll be in the clear. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

That was the idea. Allan stumbles upon someone who is dying, and the only way to save him is if Allan allows the symbiont to bond to him. There's more to it, but I don't want to spoil my story in the talk pages. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 18:15, 21 June 2009 (UTC)

:You may want to take into account his phasing ability if that's the case. As interesting as a symbiote would be, I would assume others might not be able to handle phasing the way Allan can. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

I'd have to work that out. Also if the symbiont can take the accelerated heart rate. I've also then got the problem of a character with two powers, or at the least, two personalities in one body. I'll work it over and see if I can get it to work. Maybe the symbiont can help control his heart rate and shifting, making it easier on Allan. I was thinking the symbiont would manifest as a sort of hardened biological armor. Possibly replacing Allan's missing leg when not in use as armor. All this will take much thought. Especially how to deal with the symbiont being fully sentient. I can't treat it like an object, but as a person who chose to bond with Allan. I'm glad I chose first person for the narrative, because an internal conversation would be very odd in third person. Thanks for the ideas. I'll see if I can come up with some for your story. Maybe Johnas would be a good recipient of the symbiont...

:I'd need more information before I would consider involving Jonas with a symbiote. The problem with this is that in the real world, symbiotes are more of a relationship (such as tikbirds eating pesky bugs or dead skin) than an actual species. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

Yeah, and what I have in mind is infinitely more intimate. As in, the symbiote cannot survive without a host, and after bonding, removal of the symbiont would be fatal to the host. I was thinking of a a relationship such as taking over for a bodily function, like bacteria in your intestines. Only much more complex, and with much more important functions. Such as replacing the heart, other organs, or a limb. Along with secondary external changes, such as the bio Armor. The more I think of it, the less it sounds like it would fit in with Jonas. Which makes me want it to happen to him more and more.--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 16:40, 22 June 2009 (UTC)

:Jonas would enter into such a relationship if there was a distinct benefit to be had or if a logical argument were made. On a more meta note, I would also need to know what species this symbiote teefer became blended with. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

::It doesn't need to be any identifiable species. Remember that the rules do actually state that the transformation does not just include species found on Earth. There is no evidence (might I just say 'yet' - as a way of disclaiming any future story that might contradict me) that the cause of the Torch and TFOR is not terrestrial in origin but it does not seem to be limited to species that exist on Earth. (Oh, and sorry for not chiming in later - I was at the [[TSA-Bash|Bash]] and that consumed all of my time :P) -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 18:56, 22 June 2009 (UTC)

:::True enough I suppose, but it would still have to be within reasonable bounds. Hope you enjoyed the Bash by the way. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

I haven't figured out anything yet. Much research will be needing done, and this is farther down the line in the story. I'm now thinking something along the lines of [[Wikipedia:Creature Tech|Creature Tech]], a graphic novel by Doug TenNaple. As we already have a [[User:Mr.Peaches/Have_You_Heard_About_the_TFORs%3F|dragon]] in the universe, aliens can't be far behind. I think I might be putting too much into my first foray with writing, but if it works out that'd be great. I also hope that you had fun at the Bash. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 19:29, 22 June 2009 (UTC)

== Nitpicking and Praise ==

I'll start with the nitpicking - you've broken a few grammatical rules involving the use of capital letters. Not a real biggie, but it did stand out to me.

And now for the praise… For a first effort this story shows an understanding of writing that is pretty deep. When you've got it done I'll go over it with an eye on style and deeper concerns - like I've done for one of [[User:WolfyDrake95|Wolfy Drake's]]. But as it stands, I will be adding this to [[ShadowWolfs Pack|the pack]] after you've had a chance to handle what suggestions I make.

Keep up the good work! -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 15:26, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

:Thanks for pointing that out. I know some of them are because I accidentally hit shift on my tiny keyboard, but the rest are just a combination of writing mostly around 2am and me being bad at grammar. My firefox spell check also decided I'm British and tries to change color to colour and other o->ou things.

:Thanks for the praise. I'm an avid reader, so I know how good writing is supposed to sound. Like someone who can't read sheet music can play an instrument, I just try and emulate the resulting flow and sound. SAT prep might have helped a bit, but really I think it's just from reading to darn much. What I do actively try to avoid is starting every sentence the same way. Even that is failing a bit, as I've used the same gag about three times. You know, where I say something, and then say "Or where it should have been." I'll need to patch that up with a new phrase. Either way, I extend a pre-emptive thanks for including me in the Pack. I'm very glad to be sitting in a collection with much more experienced writers.--[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 15:58, 25 June 2009 (UTC)

''"The computer beeps in response, confirming that it has made acquaintances with the leg, and would like to get to know it better. I offer that it should by him a drink, and click ok on the dialog box."'' Love this line. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

:Thanks. I might even have it where Allan has modified his OS to where the dialog boxes actually say this. I would find that hilarious in real life. And if you want to copy files, It would ask permission to "Get it on." --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 20:57, 27 June 2009 (UTC)

::I've actually done similar with MS-DOS back in the day - actually going in with a hex-editor and changing the default strings. There are some programs that let you do this for various windows programs, but you have to know where the resources are stored and such. Personally... I prefer the default prompts, because then I can ignore them easily. -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 21:09, 27 June 2009 (UTC)

== on prosthesis ==

At the point in the story I am now, the year is 2022 or so, and I was wondering if prosthetics have come far enough by this point to be directly connected to major nerves, or if it would be some other method of control. Let me know y'alls thoughts on the matter. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 20:49, 3 July 2009 (UTC)

::The PAW collab features some rather futuristic prosthetics and is set at around 2032. Maybe you could check it over and make some assumptions? --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

Good idea. I'll also do a little research on current technology projections. I was thinking of having a universal prosthesis connection base on the leg, that way different parts can be swapped in and out from different makers, but I needed to know how the base connection would be made. As it stands, I'm thinking basic nerve to electrode connections, and grafting into the exposed bone. I'm just not sure I want it to be all "[http://laugh.sub.jp/archives/images/fullmetal_alchemist.jpg FullMetal Alchemist]" automail style. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 23:20, 3 July 2009 (UTC)

:IIRC, the prosthesis in the [[PAW Collab]] are relatively new (within the past five years) and use implanted "connection" sockets. Prior to that they were likely a cross of the current "automatic action" prosthesis and "remaining nerve and muscle function" implementations. In this case you could have the original ones he gets be very advanced versions of the above noted cross-pollination and move to the "direct neural connection" variety by the early 2030's. I'd have to check with [[User:Devin|Devin]] to be exactly certain what he was going with for Sue, but I think my memory is correct here... -- [[User:ShadowWolf|ShadowWolf]] 04:47, 4 July 2009 (UTC)

After a bit of research, I realised it doesn't actually matter much to Allan. He has a [[Wikipedia:Transtibial|Transtibial]] prosthesis, so the part which would need the most processing and technology, which is the knee joint, isn't applicable. I think I'll make it connect to left over muscle tissue, for the gait recognition, but have the rest be reactive. The foot will be modeled after this: [http://www.endolite.com/foot_echelon.php Echelon Foot], but with the Toyota Engineering ankle joint, which will allow for better rotation, shock absorption, and energy transfer. With each step the heel joint compresses with some energy going to the rebound and the rest going into storage, and subtle recharging. Even if the leg should loose power, it can be used in a reactive way. I'll have to rethink the weight of the prosthesis. 20-40lbs sounds like way too much. Anyone know how much a human leg weighs? --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 23:38, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

:Your legs are ~a third of your body's total weight. So take your weight and divide by three. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel|Lloyd]]

 Just found this link, [http://www.netwellness.org/question.cfm/43046.htm Weight of amputated leg for 150lbs]. It says about 10%, or 15lbs. Allan is probably about 120lbs right now, due to hospitalization, and only the bottom half of his leg is missing, so about 4-5 lbs for the less muscled part. In all, I'd probably say the prosthesis weighs about 6-8 lbs. Thanks for the help researching. --[[Special:Contributions/99.179.100.78|99.179.100.78]] 03:27, 11 July 2009 (UTC)

== Citations and stuff ==

:I couldn't write the phrase "tear smuggling" without giving credit to the Deepspace5 song "Life is" from which I stole it. --[[User:Concerned Reader|Concerned Reader]] 01:13, 11 July 2009 (UTC)

Rebuilding

2009-07-08T06:07:17Z

99.179.100.78: /* Chapter 7, Death in the Family */ More Paragraphs!

{{byline|author=Concerned Reader|user=Concerned Reader}}

{{author note|This is very much a work in progress, and I'm not even sure how canon it is to the PAW universe. I'm mainly writing it as a challenge to myself, and to create a character for others to use in better stories.}}
{{WIP}}
{{universe|Pig and Whistle}}
{{float tag|text={{add|'''Author's Notes: New additions will start with a few words of green text.'''}}|text-background=#eeeeee}}
__TOC__

==Chapter 1, Out of Joint ==

The darkness of my dreams slowly fades into an incessant beeping coming from above my head. As consciousness approaches, the beeping consolidates into some old electronica tune pulsing out from my phone's bluetooth speakers. I open my eyes, and am instantly startled at how dark it still is. At 9:30 in the morning, light should be streaming in through the windows.

<nowiki>*THUD*</nowiki>

My attempt to sit up was a great effort, until my head met the underside of my bed. “Uggh,” I mumble to the box springs, “What is this, the third time this year?” Squirming to escape from the claustrophobic clutches of the leg supports, I suddenly feel cloth drape itself across my forehead. Oddly, the edge of the bed is still several inches away. As my morning hindered mind processed this fact, I pull myself the final distance out from under the bed. I roll over on my back and lie there for a while.

My phone reaches the end of the current song and proceeds to dig into my extensive library, searching for the next track to play. It decides I'm in a sombre mood, and queues up Dead Cities by Future Sound of London. It's an old album to be sure, but almost relevant in this day and age. I take the change in song as a signal to get up and start my day. Pulling on the edge of the bed for support, I finally realize what was wrong. The sheets had followed me under the bed.

I bolt upright, and give the bed a once over. There, near the middle of the queen size mattress, is the problem. It looked as though the sheets had been sucked partway into a small black hole.

Strange, This is the first time that's happened. I thought I could only affect myself.

This could be interesting...

I reach out toward the center of the swirl of sheets and place my palm on it. Concentrating, I slowly push my right hand down on the mattress. First it's only the top layer compressing a bit, but then the surface seems to ripple and my hand slips through. Pushing a little farther into the mattress, it feels like my arm is encased in a thick fluid. Tapioca pudding perhaps. Either way, I'm now about up to my elbow in it.

“Now what?” I mutter.

Wait, the sheets are a different density than the rest of the bed. Perhaps I can feel the change. Slowly swirling my arm back and forth, I fail to notice any change in the tactile feel of the mattress. Hold on, this bit feels different. Lets see... I move my arm left a bit. Here's the empty space between springs. I move my arm slightly upwards. This part is a lot denser, it must be metal or wood. Not something I'd want to pull out. To the upper right, now this feels better. I can only hope I've found the right thing, because I'm now up to my shoulder in mattress, which is not exactly comfortable. It doesn't help that my time is running out, as evident by the very strong, very fast pulsing in my neck, as well as the uncomfortable heat on my arm.

Now how do I grab something ''inside'' of something else? If I can match frequency or phase or whatever it is I do with it, then maybe I can separate it from the rest of the bed. The first few grasps return very little results, and my arm is approaching the unpleasantly warm to hot threshold. My warning to start pulling out. With one last attempt, I grab at it, finally catching hold of something. “Yes!” I shout, clutching what I hope is the wad of sheets that had sunk into my bed, and slowly start retrieving my arm and sheets. It pulls out much the same way a spoon does from jello. The bed seems to stick to them for a bit, before sliding back into a solid shape.

I start to dance a little triumphant jig, which my mother takes as her queue to open my door. “Gwhaaaah!” I exclaim while attempting to cover most of my naked self with the newly recovered sheets. “Don't you knock? I would appreciate it very much!” I shout at her. The door closes with an embarrassed “Sorry!” and flurry of footsteps.

{{Separator|stars}}

Perhaps some explanations are in order. Possibly even an introduction.

My name is Allan Willson. The Willson comes from my family, the Allan part I chose for myself. It was taken from one Alan Turing, the father of most useful programing languages, and indirectly some less useful ones. My personal favorite is an esoteric language called BrainF*ck. BF is Turing Complete, but only has eight recognized commands: “,.[]+-<>”. The simple “Hello world” program looks like this:

++++++++++[>+++++++>++++++++++>+++>+<<<<-]>++.>+.+++++++..+++.>++.<<+++++++++++++++.>.+++.------.--------.>+.>.

When run, it outputs "Hello World," which of course makes perfect sense.

As you may have guessed from the escapades with the bed, I'm a teefer. I'm still human-ish. I've only been altered a bit. I'm not quite sure how it happened, or how to explain it, but I can “phase” through things. My high school educated guess is that the Torch did not interact well with my ADHD, or the ADHD medicine I was taking. I contracted Blowtorch Fever when I was about sixteen. At the time, I was taking amphetamines for ADHD. This did two strange things when TFOR set in.

:1) Due to the amphetamines, my heart rate was about 130 bpm. The Torch decided that this must be my normal baseline, and reset it accordingly. Other factors were set to new defaults as well, leading to a final cure for my ADHD, but now my resting heart rate is 110-130 beats per minute.
:2) My personal quantum/space/time phase is unlocked. In short, it seems that my molecules can defract around other molecules.

The effort required to make it through is based on the density of the material. Metals are the hardest, and If I spend to much time in one, the constant friction and vibration of my molecules leads to very uncomfortable heating and an extremely high heartrate. Think 230 bpm. Oh, and possible death, but I haven't tested that last part. It seems to be much like light can behave like a particle or a wave. There's probably more I could do with what I've got, but I don't have the time, nor the energy to figure it all out. Hence this mornings new discovery. Now at least I can sleep with clothes on, and not worry about leaving them behind if I ever decide I need to go through a wall.

With this revelation in mind, I quickly get dressed. On my way to the door, I put on my watch and grab my phone, which has now switched to playing more upbeat songs. As I walk down the hall, the phone detects the speakers in the living room, and automatically connects to them, leaving my room enveloped in silence. Passing into the kitchen, my phone informs the coffee maker of my presence. It proceeds to make me my personal cup of joe. Just the way I like it.

==Chapter 2, Morning After==

While I grab the now brewed coffee, my mom is at the stove, whisking together what I believe to be pancake batter. A quick survey of the ingredients and boxes on the counter confirm my assumption.

“Do you want nuts in yours?” She asks, as I pull up a chair at the table.

“No thanks, plain is fine.”

“Alright,” she replies, opening the oven to remove the precooked plain pancakes kept warm by the glow of the heating element. The oven door squeaks closed as she turns and places the plate in front of me. After a quick blessing, I start eating, and she turns back to mixing the batter for the next batch. I drown out the light scraping of the whisk on the bowl, and look over the newspaper laying on the table.

I'm just about through eating when I hear a sudden “Oh” from behind me. I lower the paper and turn around. “Don't forget to take your medicine!”

“I won't” I say, grabbing the bottle of pills off of the counter. With a rattle, I set them next to my drink.

The onset of TFORs may have cured my ADHD, but it also introduced several new problems. If I don't take beta blockers, my heart rate will be anywhere from 110 at rest, to 210 when active. This may not have been too bad, but the higher my heart rate, the easier it is for me to accidentally phase through something. That's what happened last night. I must have forgotten to take my night dosage. A quick glance at my watch informs me that I'm currently running at 115 bpm. The watch starts blinking at 130, vibrates at 150, and if I ever hit 180, its alarm can be heard over almost anything.

My mother knows about the phasing, but I'll keep the recent discovery to myself. She doesn't need to know that it just became easier for me to run away. If I ever felt so inclined. I'd thought about it a few times, what with my dad working all the time as a security guard up at the old Pantex nuclear weapons facility, and my mom temping as a secretary for the V-22 Osprey manufacturing plant; but I could wait until I finish summer school. By then I'd be off to college anyways. University of Texas is looking really good right now, what with Austin being the new tech center of the world, but I may just be slightly biased.

You may have noticed that both my parents work jobs that have ties to the military. It's not because we're excessively patriotic, though we do love our country. On my moms side, it was more of just chance. Working as a temp is like that. You fill a role for a while, then move to the next one. She'd held this job for a little more than a year. I think she may ask them to make it permanent. My dad would much rather be preaching than guarding, but the circumstances of the situation forced his hand. The facility needed more guards, and he happened to have the experience they were looking for. The church he was looking to become a part of had a slight anti-teefer bias, which he took as a sign that God didn't think that was the place for him. Pantex contacted him slightly before the church gig fell through. After some thought, he agreed to the Pantex contract for the same reason he denied the church. It seemed God wanted him there. At least the Republic is very defensive oriented. I rather doubt that he'll see more action than turning away lost hikers.

Come to think of it, I didn't hear him come home last night.

“Hey, Mom. Did Dad come home from work last night?” At the sound of my voice, my mom stops mixing the batter, and sets it aside.

“Unfortunately not. The base got word of a possible flyover sometime today. They should have clearance, but the Pantex facility is still a no fly zone. All security has been stepped up, so he'll be working most of the day. I've got to head in to work as well, so make sure you keep the house clean after I leave.”

“I will. After I get back from Calculus I'll mow the lawn as well. It's looking pretty bad out front.”

“Thanks. You're always so helpful around the house. We may need to start paying you the maid's fee.” She says with a smile.

“Sounds good to me,” I reply with a chuckle. “I've got to go. See you later tonight.”

“Don't forget the...”

“I know!” I blurt out, turning around to grab a pill out of the container. I swallow it with a quick sip of water, scoot in my chair, and then head for the main hallway. While walking through, I pull out my phone, and give it a shake to turn off the music. That accomplished, I re-seat it in my pocket and grab my bag on the way out. I open the door, hesitate a moment, then turn and say, “See ya.” As I turn back and walk out the door, kicking it closed behind me, I pull out the keys to my ancient 97 Toyota Previa.

I'd found it in a junk yard in mostly working condition. It's odd looks, coupled with the custom stereo, subwoofers, and gauges in the dash that someone had installed before the collapse made me immediately fall in love with it. The only problem was that at around sixteen mpg, it was hardly street legal. After some research, I'd found out that it was a front mid-engine, rear wheel drive, and supercharged minivan. This only increased my interest in it. After about a year of learning all the internals of the car, I successfully converted it to a hydrogen/gasoline hybrid. The hydride tanks were installed in the back, filling in the space not inhabited by the subwoofer boxes, and the main ECU had been replaced with one that supported the new fuel source, as well as the Wide Area Network.

I unlocked the car door using the physical key, as the car had no keyless entry, and started it up. My phone synced up to the stereo through the older bluetooth protocols that the ancient head unit supported, and queued up my driving playlist. Drum and bass filled the air, followed by the slight whistle of the supercharger spinning up. I backed out of the drive way, checked my mirrors, and was on my way to Amarillo College to brush up on my calculus skills.

==Chapter 3, Higher Education==

I'm attending summer school because not all of my credits carried over when we moved to this town just above Amarillo. I've got Calculus on Monday and Wednesday, and Government on Tuesdays. It's a bit of a pain that they didn't transfer, but I'm just glad they recognized my graduation from high school. Repeating senior year is not my idea of fun, but then again, school does introduce you to people. At the moment, my total friend count consists of people in my classes, and some kid down the block. None of them can be called close friends. I haven't had close friends since we moved from California.

California. Now there's a place I don't miss. The weather's perfect, you're about three hours from the beach, snowy mountains, or an amusement park, and being different is severely looked down on. I was different. Not just because of my teeferdom. No, I was different much before that. I was a Christian from some weird place called Texas. We had originally moved to California so that my dad could study at a seminary. I don't recall the name, it didn't apply to me. What concerned me was trying to fit in. Sure I had friends, but only two of them were good friends. The rest were just there. Background noise to my life.

Back then, I wasn't very strong. I would cry a lot. Sometimes around others, usually because of others. I had been called almost every derogatory and demeaning name available. During my junior year, of the few friends that I had, two of them turned on me. This left me with the two people who were on my side, against an evergrowing number that were against me.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will always scar me.

I always enjoyed it when it was raining. With the fresh smell in the air, I'd sit alone and look to the sky. It seemed to all the world that God was crying with me.

Senior year wasn't as hard as I had thought it would be. With two off-campus periods, I had time to work a retail job. It was boring, but it brought home some cash. Physics B turned out to be easier than pre-Ap physics, and Computer Science was quickly becoming my favorite class. For once I could tell something what to do, and it would do it. Minus the occasional “NULL_POINTER” error. Things were looking up. Almost everyone has grown up by senior year, or at least grown apathetic enough to not care anymore. As graduation approached with growing speed, I was happy those four years were almost over. I had been through a lot.

It was my sophomore year that I caught the torch. That was in 2018. The medicine in the NAR had more or less caught up to Blowtorch Fever. So it was in the capable hands of the hospital that I survived my encounter. After it had run its course of about five days, I was back in school. The heightened heart rate gave them pause, but they released me anyways, figuring it was temporary. I noticed that I didn't need my ADHD medicine anymore, and stopped taking it. I didn't notice anything wrong until graduation.

As it turns out, the mixture of an energy drink, for the graduation party, and the excitement of graduating was enough to trigger my first phase shift. I must have been running at around 200 bpm, but I hadn't checked. Either way, as I walked to collect my diploma, on stage in front of everybody and their parents, I started to slowly sink into the floor. It wasn't a quick drop through the floor. No, it was a slow decent, like sinking in mud. I had taken three steps before I noticed anything. I finally looked down at the odd resistance pulling at my feet, and saw that they were a good half foot under the surface of the stage. My shoes and socks were laying several feet behind me. This revelation only raised my heart rate higher, which did nothing to quicken my decent. After passing through the wooden layer of the stage, my feet hit the metal frame. This slowed my decent considerably. By now I was trying to pull myself out of the floor with frantic motions. I lost my balance and fell face first. I braced for an impact, but it felt more like falling into a pool. Hard, but then forgiving. Either because of the impact, or because of the shock of falling through a solid floor, I soon lost consciousness. The last thing I heard was the combined reaction of everybody around me. It sounded something like, “Holy Shit!”

The following is what I heard later from my parents and the paramedics.

I learned that upon falling over, I had phased out of my clothes as well. Thankfully I was both unconscious and on my stomach by the time this happened. My decent continued, until I fell through the other side of the stage, and dropped five feet into the under-stage storage. My heart rate had fallen a bit due to the unconscious state of my mind, so I didn't start passing farther through. At the first sign of my fall, someone had called the paramedics. They pulled me out of the under-stage storage, and upon checking my pulse, gave me something to slow it down. They report that at this stage, I was running at about 183 bpm. They took me to the hospital, where I was finally diagnosed with Transformative Failure of Ontogenetic Regulation, and released three days later with a prescription for the beta blockers to control my pulse. I was pretty much out of it the whole time, waking up every few hours, only to fall asleep again. I finally awoke in my own bed, and knew something was wrong. Thankfully my parents were there to explain everything to me.

I was more of a freak than I was before. Only now I could walk through walls. Albeit at the time, only without clothes. Rather than have to live with the fame and misfortune associated with teefers, we moved back to Texas. Which brings me here on this farm road, driving fifteen miles into Amarillo to retake my classes that never transferred.

I signal a lane change, and take the exit to the Amarillo College campus. This was going to be a long day.

==Chapter 4, 22:22, November 12, 2020==

Everything was going great after moving from California. No more harassment, no explaining what I was, what I could do. In my Calculus class I was even starting to form friendships. Nothing to close, but at the very least, I was forming connections. Everything changed on November the twelfth of year 2020.

That was when the first bomb fell. I was downtown at the time, but in a town this small, that's about three miles from the edge of town. All I know is that the church bell tower had just started to strike 10:30pm. It had always been a little fast, but it kept the town on time.

Bong

Bong

Bong

Bo--Crack-- Suddenly the bell was cut off by a loud impact.

I turned away from the Ice cream social I was attending, and looked at the tower, or where the tower should have been. Instead It looked like someone had cut it off midway up, at an angle like the stem of a potted flower. I had very little time to contemplate on this when a blinding flash lit up what was left of the tower in silhouette. A deafening report was then issued across the land. The ground seemed to rise up and roll over as the shockwave blew past us, ruffling anything light and loose enough to move, as well as blowing out almost every window. Including the ones on my car. I'd barely had time to register the loss of the church, much less my windows, when the second flash and report sounded. Five times an explosion was heard, and five different locations where left in ruins. They were spaced out randomly, some as close together as a few hundred feet, some as far as several miles. The last one landed out in the woods, in the general direction of the Pantex facility.

At the second flash, I took of running to my house. Reason was left behind with my car, I just needed to get home. Oh, right. That's where my mother was.

On the way, I see the third flash on the edge of my vision. The report soon rolls past me, urging me to go faster. The delay was shorter, the bombs were coming closer. I pick up speed. My heart rate passes 150 bpm as my watch begins to buzz on my wrist.

I reach my house in a couple of minutes. Three long strides up the steps, and I'm at the front door. Without even bothering to slow down, I close my eyes, and walk right through the front door.

“Mom! Where are you? Are you all right?” I shout into the empty hallway.

“In here!” a muffled reply echoes from around the kitchen.

“Where is here?” I yell back, rushing into the dinning room.

“The hall closet! Hurry!”

I sprint toward the closet, avoiding the dinner table on the way, but almost tripping on a chair. Once at the closet, I yank open the door, and throw myself inside, letting the door close behind me. My mom is crouched next to the inside wall. I sit down next to her and take her hand, about to say something when a loud smash resounds from the back porch. My phrase changes mid sentence.

“how are yo-” *Crack* “-ohhhh Shi-”

My curse is cut off by the blinding light of the explosion, and an ear shattering detonation. The shock-wave throws me bodily through were the wall was moments before. The house was coming down on top of us!

Quickly I reach out for my mother. She's laying on the floor, afloat in a sea of rubble. A loud beeping is emanating from my wrist, but I pay it no attention until I attempt to grab my moms hand. As her body and mine meet, my hand passes right through.

“Shit! Come on, not now!”

I check to see what the beeping is trying to tell me. The watch reports that I'm currently running at 210 bpm. Great. I grab at her hand again, and again pass right through. The ceiling is now raining down on us, two by fours and insulation falling in our midst. A loud crack emits from one of the supports, and with a shudder, the roof gives way.

With every last ounce of concentration, I reach out one more time. Finally I grab hold of my mothers hand. Then my world passes into silence. It didn't hurt as much as I thought it would, the ceiling collapsing on us. Felt more like getting punched everywhere at once. Looking to my right, I check that I still have a firm grasp on my mother. Thankfully she had phased through with me. It was odd to see parts of the roof sticking out of her, but a quick pull dislodged her from them. She appeared to be unconscious. I set her on the flattest rubble I could find, the remains of the dinning room table, and unphased her. The table was missing a few legs, but was generally intact. With her hand still in mine, I checked her pulse. Still alive. I sigh in relief.

Exhausted, I ignore the incessant beeping coming from my wrist, and unphase myself. Unfortunately, in all the excitement, my foot had sunk into what was left of the floor. As I unphased, the floor solidified around it, the molecules interlocking each other. Then, just as unfortunately, I lost consciousness, and fell forward.

I didn't feel my leg snap somewhere in the middle of the shin, but I heard it.

==Chapter 5, Unforeseen Consequences==

Again the darkness of my dreams slowly fades into an incessant beeping coming from above my head. I crack open my eyes, allowing them to grow used to the light. Everything looks white. White walls, white ceiling, even white bed sheets. The beeping is coming from the monitor above my bed. With each beep, a wave crosses the line.

Bedeep

Bedeep

Bedeep

The readout says 89. Good, they have me on beta blockers or something. I lay back down, and soon fall asleep again.

{{Separator|stars}}

I awake again to muffled voices. It takes me a bit to fully remove myself from my sleepy haze.

“... seems to have stabilized.” Says somebody I don't recognize, probably a doctor or nurse. “Hold on, he's coming to.”

I slide backwards in an attempt to sit up. In the room there is a doctor and a nurse discussing my condition. The doctor notices me struggling to sit up, and hands me the control for the bed. After raising the back a bit and getting comfortable, I ask the first thing that comes to mind.

“Hows my mother doing?”

The doctor turns to dismiss the nurse,then turns back towards me.

“Your mother is doing fine. Thanks, no doubt, to your quick action. She hasn't left your side for most of your stay. She would be her now, but she was needed at work. As your only current source of income, she decided against taking time off. Your foot, on the other hand, was less fortunate.”

“How long have I --” Suddenly the reality of his words catches up to me. I realize that on my right leg, I can't feel anything below my knee. Only a sort of odd tingle, like I'm touching something thats slightly electrified. Bolting farther upright, I reach for my where my lower leg should have been.

It wasn't there.

“What happened?” I ask, after falling back into a sitting position.

“The break in your leg was clean, and the surrounding damage was extreme, but not unmendable. Your leg could have been saved, but the lower portion was, uhh, ''embedded'' in the floor.” The paramedics couldn't figure out how to extract it without causing unrepairable damage. To keep you from bleeding to death, they had to cut it off right at the break so that they could move you to the hospital.”

While he was telling me this, I just kinda zoned out. I kept leaning forward to check that my leg was really gone, and every time, it wasn't there. I could still sorta feel it. Phantom limb they call it. The brain thinks that there's still something there and tries to talk to the nerves, or is it the other way around? I'm not quite sure. Suddenly I realized that the doctor had finished speaking. I stopped feeling the bandaged stump of my leg, and sat back down to reply.

“Right. Look, I'm really tired, so I think I'll lay back down and go to sleep. If that's alright.”

The doctor looked down at me and replied, “Oh, no, you need all the rest you can get, but you will need to start thinking about which type of prosthetic you want to get, if any. I'll have the nurse bring in some catalogues when you feel more up to it. You'll need to make a choice fairly quickly, before the leg heals completely over, otherwise it will be harder to install the prosthetic connection base.”

“Thanks.” I reply, lowering the back of the bed into the reclined position. The doctor leaves, and I soon fall asleep again.

{{Separator|stars}}

Some time later, I awake to the feeling that I've forgotten something. Something important. As I think over this nagging feeling, I look around the room again. The stack of prosthetics catalogues is sitting next to the bed, within easy reach, and someone has left some flowers on the table/desk next to me. What am I forgetting? I don't know, and I'm not sure I want to find out.

To distract myself, I grab one of the catalogues and start flipping through it. My non-leg is still sending phantom signals to my brain, causing me to itch the stump ever now and then. It's a very odd feeling, and is starting to become annoying.

The first catalogue I picked up was for a company called Synthetics. Several of the designs were very nice, and some of them even looked real enough to pass as a flesh and bone leg. Then I saw the prices. $7000 for a single leg! These guys must be the luxury brand of prosthetics, one of the pieces even had the heel suspension designed by Lotus engineering. These were some serious feet.

After thumbing through a few more pages, I put down the Synthetics catalogue as way out of our price range. I grab the next catalog from the top. Just looking at the cover I know this one isn't for me. The cover piece is a very nice looking pair of fox legs. The brand name is Furry Feet, and they cater to almost every species that a teefer could be. The prices are much better than Synthetics, but I don't think I could pull off wearing one anthropomorphic leg and one not. I set this catalogue down and reach for the next one.

Well, this definitely looks to be in our price range. It seems that Asus has expanded their EEE line into even more categories. I kinda stopped paying attention to them after they released about twenty different versions of the same netbook. Underneath the EEE logo was the tagline, “Easy to work, Easy to Learn, Easy to Play.” Now these sounded promising. With a crinkle, I open the magazine and start working through the designs. Most of them are no frills, but every now and then there's one with a few good features. I finally find the one that seems perfect for me. The EEE PLR-1200. It's a lower leg prosthetic running a stripped down open source Linux shell, and it didn't have all that many features. Only gait recognition and a Toyota Engineering designed heel and ankle joint. It didn't even have a skin like covering, just the bare-bones leg frame and elastomers. What attracted me to it was the phrase, “Modifications covered under warranty.” That, along with the open source embedded OS meant that I could customize the crap out of the thing, and still not worry about breaking it. It also helped that it was priced at a much more reasonable $1500 per leg. I only needed one anyways. I grab the sharpie that the nurse had been thoughtful enough to leave on the table, and circle the PLR-1200. With that task done, I lay back down to rest a bit more.

{{Separator|stars}}

{{Add|My mom visited the next day. I felt much better after a full nights rest, and was starting to become used to the prospect of not having a lower right leg. It still felt really odd, but even the ghost nerve signals were fading.

She entered the room, went straight to my side, and took my hand.
“How are you doing?” She asks, her concern showing in her eyes.}}

“I'm fine now. Well, other than missing a chunk of leg anyway.” I reply, sitting up a bit more. “Want to see it?” I ask, making to pull the covers off and present the stump

“No thanks!” She hastily blurts out, raising her hand between her eyes and the offending limb. “I saw enough of it without the bandage!”

“Fine” I say with fake indignation, lowering my leg along with the covers. I was happy she was here. I always enjoyed our conversations, and the distraction from everything was welcome. We chatted small for a while, but then I had to know. Pulling myself up into a more serious posture, I ask what has been on my mind.

“What happened? Where's Dad?”

Before I had even finished asking, my mothers face hardened, matching the seriousness of my questions. A hint of pain slips into her countenance, and I instantly regret asking her so soon, but I must know. Something the doctor had said earlier had come to my attention. Something about “only source of income.” his words echo in my mind, loosening fears and doubts.

“Where is Dad?” I repeat, concern and fear creeping into my voice.

My mother stands there for a moment, thinking through her words. Chewing on them one at a time. I wait patiently until she finally speaks.

“As far as anybody knows, we were hit by a random bombing run. The Rangers are in town now, trying to figure everything out.” She starts out, her words a bit rough, layered with barely hidden emotion, but soon she picks up strength, happy to finally have it out of the way.

“They think the target may have been the Pantex facility, but none of the bombs got that far.”

“Wait, thats where dad works! Is he alright?” I exclaim, bolting farther upright on the bed.

She looks up, startled by the interruption. At first I thought she was mad, but then I realized that tears were forming at the edges of her eyes. I reach out to take her hand, deciding to let her finish completely before interrupting again. As she finishes gathering her thoughts, I lean back a little more, tired from sitting up to long. Soon enough, she starts again, in a much quieter, emotional tone.

“Your father was caught up in the last blast, out in the middle of his patrolling area around Pantex. When help arrived, he was already de--” Here she stopped, seemingly unable to say the word. By now the tears were flowing freely, and sobs interrupted her speech. Between tears, she continued, finally deciding on a word to use.

“He was already gone when they arrived. There was nothing they could do.”

I leaned forward as she leaned toward me, accepting the unasked for embrace. We held each other for a long time. I couldn't cry, not yet, but her tears were enough for the both of us. Only when the room was empty again did I allow my tears to come. I cried to the only things that wouldn't care. The ceiling received my tears with indifference, and the monitors continued their steady beeping without noticing my weakness. If God was in his heaven, I doubted he cared about one kid in Texas, crying to an empty room.

==Chapter 6, A New Step==

As soon as I was discharged, we went prosthetic shopping. Well, we didn't really go much of anywhere, prosthesis aren't exactly mainstream products. So to be more accurate, we went Internet shopping from the comfort of my room. The catalogue had listed their homepage, as well as several authorized retailers. Thus armed with a list, we started shopping around.

My mom grew bored about five minutes in and left to throw some lunch together. I was glad to be back on home cooking, Hospital meals are decent, but only serve the purpose of helping you heal. Flavor and flash are less of a priority. I was hoping for a chicken pot pie later tonight at dinner, but have no idea what she would whip up for lunch. With my mind still on food, I return to the task at hand, and turn back to my computer.

Like most everything else in my possession, my computer is a home-brew job. I'd started with some name brand, but years of revision on it, and several case transplants have lost the name to the ages. Currently I was running an AMD Athlon XX-4800+ BE. It may be the high end of two generations ago, but that doesn't mean it's lowly twenty cores were much slower than the newer forty and sixty core machines. Especially sense I had clocked it around 7.2 GHz. The phase change compressor required to keep it as close to zero degrees Celsius created an audible hum, much like a small refrigerator might do, but the chilly temperatures and 2.2GHz gain off stock were worth the noise polution. The processor, along with ATI's last gen graphics card and a few terabytes of drive space completed the ensemble. I'd thought of buying some newer DDR4 ram, but the price to performance was not in favor to my wallet. A change in ram would require a new motherboard, and then I was looking at about $200 purchase. My sixteen gigs of DDR3 are working fine, thank you.

All this power did nothing to make the Internet any faster as I waited for the page to load. I could stop the updates that were currently downloading, but the loss of bandwidth was worth a new virus not eating my files. Besides, one megabit out of six was enough to get by on. I was currently building a thin client firewall out of spare parts, but for now, my software firewall would have to make due. Thankfully, the newest distribution of Ubuntu had a very good one built in.

the address bar reports that I'm currently at “Prosthesis Emporium,” and the price listed is one of the best I've seen all day. While grabbing my moms credit card with my left hand, I add the leg to the cart and click the “checkout now” button. I punch in the relevant information off of the card, “check the second day air” box, and sit back in the chair. Another two hundred dollars for faster shipping was nothing to sneeze at. Thankfully our insurance covered most of the leg and hospital bills, and the leg was needed before the funeral.

...
...The funeral...
…

suddenly my world comes crashing back down, the weight of my father's death catching up to me. An overshadowing despair. The tears come unbidden, flowing fast and free. I just sag in the chair, letting it all flow out. Draining my sadness away. After a bit I find my mother's hand resting on my shoulder, attempting to comfort me. My tears dry up quick, but my voice betrays my emotion. Warbling and broken with halting sobs.

“Why?” I ask more to the universe than my mother. “I just want to know why. Why were we bombed? Why weren't we warned? Why did he have to die?”

“I don't know.” She replies, then pauses. “I wish I did, but I don't. I don't have the answers, just more questions. I've been asking God questions every day of my life.”

“And he doesn't seem to be answering, does he?” I interrupt, sitting back up in the chair. “He'd better have some good answers when I die, because He has a lot to answer for.”

==Chapter 7, Death in the Family==

The leg arrived right on time, five days before the funeral. I tore into the packaging as fast as I could, pausing only momentarily to admire the box and PLR-1200 logo before tearing that open as well. I made sure to keep the UPC code, the warranty dictating that it be kept in a safe place. With undisguised glee, I pulled the leg out of the now decimated box, and set it on the ground. Without a charge, it slumps over backwards, rotating along the ankle joint before I could catch it. The carpet helped muffle the fall, as well as protecting the leg from damage. I fish around in the box until I find the wall charger, and shrink wrapped mass of manuals and guides.

With the charger in one hand, and the leg in the other, I crawl over to the wall, and after some searching, plug the leg in. A red led starts flashing on one of the panels of the leg, the small engraved text above it reads, “Charging.” That accomplished, I crawl back to the box, and separate the manual from the rats nest of cables, flashdrives, and quick start guides. I'm not sure how you quick start a prosthetic leg, but they seemed to have found a way. Making sure the manual says “English” on the front, I crack it open and start reading. The charger is a four hour quickcharger, so I've got some time to kill.

I finish the manual in roughly thirty minutes, and start on the next step: installing the software on my computer. It's mainly the update utilities, along with digital versions of the manuals and guides. I plug the flashdrive into the front USB 3.0 port, and let auto configure do it's job. It asks for my password and permission to get to it. I punch it in, and click go. A progress bar pops up and starts edging towards the right of the screen.

According to the manual, as long as the leg's pressure lines and external body aren't punctured, It should be water proof to about 30 bar of pressure. I wasn't planning on doing any deep sea diving, so this hardly applied to me. It was good to know none the less. Also according to the manual, the heel and ankle joint, which was engineered jointly by Toyota R&D Texas and Toyota Engineering North America, could withstand weights of up to 2000 pounds, and an impact force of up to 500. After loosing the leg, I weighed about 125 pounds. With the prosthetic, I'd weigh about 160 pounds, so I don't think I'd be straining it too much.

A glance at my watch told me that I was running at ninety beats per minute, and that only one hour had passed. My impatiens takes over, and I unplug the leg, drag it over to the computer, and plug it in. The USB 3.0 power bus should continue charging it. Sure enough, as soon as I plug it in, the charging light comes back on, as well as the red “Do Not Disconnect” led. The computer beeps in response, confirming that it has made acquaintances with the leg, and would like to get to know it better. I offer that it should by him a drink, and click ok on the dialog box. The newest version of the firmware begins it's download. I sit back in the chair, my stump just barely jutting over the edge, then open up Firefox to search for third party modifications and other Open Source goodies.

A while later, I hear a beep from the leg. The charging light has turned green. Whenever I'm doing something that draws most or all of my attention, I loose track of time. The three and a half hours that it had taken the leg to charge seemed like only five minutes to me. In that span of time, I'd found and bookmarked several dozen webpages related to the PLR-1200. Most of them were modification pages, but several were dedicated to a custom compiled operating system meant to enhance the legs capabilities. The mods were cool, but the OS I found very interesting, and could possibly be very useful.

{{Add|With the leg now fully charged, I could mate It with the base connection that was grafted into the end of my stump. The place were the skin and metal met had a very odd, almost cyberpunk feel, which was not unwelcome. Without the artificial skin covering the leg, it too looked to be a cyberpunk mantelpiece. With a faint clink, and the tightening of a couple hex bolts, the PLR-1200 was secured to what was left of my leg. I experimentally lift my leg up. It's a fairly heavy piece of equipment, being made of cheaper materials, rather than lighter. I think most of it was Aluminum or Magnesium. Because I still have my knee left, most of the difficult movement is still done by my body. The leg only has to deal with the distribution of weight on the ankle, and keeping me from falling on uneven ground. The connection uses several electrodes embedded into left over muscles and nerves, leading to an almost natural replication of movement. It would take some time to get used to, but I don't think it should take too long.}}

By the time the funeral rolled around, I was already used to the leg. It actually took me less time to learn to walk again than it did for me to learn to drive a manual transmission. The leg was hidden beneath my long dark slacks; the foot hidden beneath Doc Martins and long socks. I went through the motions, and acted as I should, but I wasn't feeling it. I felt really out of place, surrounded by crying people, when I myself had dried up a week beforehand. It felt as if I was tear smuggling, sneaking them through until I was alone.

Death shouldn't be a sad occurrence. It signifies the passing of a life into a better place. Heaven, paradise, whatever you do or don't believe in. But in this case, it felt more like his life was stolen away. Taken before his time was ready, like a surprise party a month before the birthday. “I hope you're enjoying yourself up there, watching us toil around down here.” I mutter to the casket, as it is lowered into it's six foot resting place. The pastor says a few words I don't pay much attention to, and the rest of the day passes in a blur. By the end of it, I'm very tired of hearing about how sorry everyone is for my loss. I haven't lost anything. Loss implies that it won't be found again. I certainly hope to be seeing my dad again, though maybe not anytime soon.

{{author note|More to come, or something.}}
[[Category:Story]][[Category:Concerned Reader]][[Category:Pig and Whistle]]