Convoluted Quality - Revision history

Lloyd Brunnel: ...though I'm slightly less happy about my own typos

2009-07-09T12:09:42Z

...though I'm slightly less happy about my own typos

← Older revision		Revision as of 07:09, 9 July 2009
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	{{author note\|In honor of the [http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/ Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest], a competition to create the worst opening sentence to the worst possible novel, I have created this page that I hope will host the worst opening sentences to the worst possible TF stories. The first two are just starters but if you think you can do worse (and I hope you can) please feel free to add to this. Don't forget to sign your work either!}}		{{author note\|In honor of the [http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/ Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest], a competition to create the worst opening sentence to the worst possible novel, I have created this page that I hope will host the worst opening sentences to the worst possible TF stories. The first two are just starters but if you think you can do worse (and I hope you can) please feel free to add to this. Don't forget to sign your work either!}} {{fiction}}

	# Alex collapsed in pain as the change began; he felt his body convulse and writhe and his mind give way to an orgy of feral instincts and lost humanity as the first strand of fur was birthed from his arm. [[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]]		# Alex collapsed in pain as the change began; he felt his body convulse and writhe and his mind give way to an orgy of feral instincts and lost humanity as the first strand of fur was birthed from his arm. [[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]]
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	# When Nick had climbed across the fence into the forbidden house, he ''had'' seen the sign that said "STUPID trespassers will be turned into STUPID animals!", but since he was just a normal trespasser, and not a stupid trespasser, he ignored it, because he sure as hell wasn't stupid. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]]		# When Nick had climbed across the fence into the forbidden house, he ''had'' seen the sign that said "STUPID trespassers will be turned into STUPID animals!", but since he was just a normal trespasser, and not a stupid trespasser, he ignored it, because he sure as hell wasn't stupid. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]]
	# The irony was that long-time chocolate lover Tony was turning to that which could not eat chocolate: a dog...in the ''Land of Unlimited Amounts of Free Chocolate For Everyone Twenty-Four-Seven''. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]] 15:55, 7 July 2009 (UTC)		# The irony was that long-time chocolate lover Tony was turning to that which could not eat chocolate: a dog...in the ''Land of Unlimited Amounts of Free Chocolate For Everyone Twenty-Four-Seven''. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]] 15:55, 7 July 2009 (UTC)
	~~{{fiction}}~~
	# Our story begins on a small farm in the praries--which may make you think this is about someone turning into a horse or a cow, but what if I told you this was a story about a young boy and his howler monkey? --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] July 9 2009		# Our story begins on a small farm in the praries--which may make you think this is about someone turning into a horse or a cow, but what if I told you this was a story about a young boy and his howler monkey? --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] July 9 2009

Lloyd Brunnel: I'm so happy this is being added to again

2009-07-09T12:08:53Z

I'm so happy this is being added to again

← Older revision		Revision as of 07:08, 9 July 2009
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	# The irony was that long-time chocolate lover Tony was turning to that which could not eat chocolate: a dog...in the ''Land of Unlimited Amounts of Free Chocolate For Everyone Twenty-Four-Seven''. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]] 15:55, 7 July 2009 (UTC)		# The irony was that long-time chocolate lover Tony was turning to that which could not eat chocolate: a dog...in the ''Land of Unlimited Amounts of Free Chocolate For Everyone Twenty-Four-Seven''. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]] 15:55, 7 July 2009 (UTC)
	{{fiction}}		{{fiction}}
			# Our story begins on a small farm in the praries--which may make you think this is about someone turning into a horse or a cow, but what if I told you this was a story about a young boy and his howler monkey? --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] July 9 2009

WolfyDrake95: Who's the lousier writer now, Concerned Reader? TAKE A LOOK AT THIS!!! :)

2009-07-07T15:55:41Z

Who's the lousier writer now, Concerned Reader? TAKE A LOOK AT THIS!!! :)

← Older revision		Revision as of 10:55, 7 July 2009
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	# As the last of their number had finished changing, the druid ancients began the long march to their holy spring, for it was only in those sacred waters that the sacred rite of Cat Snorkeling could commence. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]]		# As the last of their number had finished changing, the druid ancients began the long march to their holy spring, for it was only in those sacred waters that the sacred rite of Cat Snorkeling could commence. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]]
	# My situation grew slightly better, as the fangs and claws grew in, but I was still at a disadvantage because he had the gun, and I was strapped down to the table. --[[User:Concerned Reader\|Concerned Reader]] 03:24, 7 July 2009 (UTC)		# My situation grew slightly better, as the fangs and claws grew in, but I was still at a disadvantage because he had the gun, and I was strapped down to the table. --[[User:Concerned Reader\|Concerned Reader]] 03:24, 7 July 2009 (UTC)
			# As Ben's entire body began to turn soft and brown and stinky, he decided to blame his friend, who'd offered him ten bucks to run over to anyone across the street and scream "EAT MY POO!"; then again, maybe he shouldn't have chosen the person who had this wierd glowy pointy stick in the first place. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]]
			# When Nick had climbed across the fence into the forbidden house, he ''had'' seen the sign that said "STUPID trespassers will be turned into STUPID animals!", but since he was just a normal trespasser, and not a stupid trespasser, he ignored it, because he sure as hell wasn't stupid. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]]
			# The irony was that long-time chocolate lover Tony was turning to that which could not eat chocolate: a dog...in the ''Land of Unlimited Amounts of Free Chocolate For Everyone Twenty-Four-Seven''. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]] 15:55, 7 July 2009 (UTC)
	{{fiction}}		{{fiction}}

Concerned Reader: yeah, I can write bad too.

2009-07-07T03:24:29Z

yeah, I can write bad too.

← Older revision		Revision as of 22:24, 6 July 2009
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	# When practicing magic it is important that one is careful not to do something stupid like create a ravenous plague of were-plushies that ends up wiping out your entire country, since that would be a really embarrassing situation. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 20th.		# When practicing magic it is important that one is careful not to do something stupid like create a ravenous plague of were-plushies that ends up wiping out your entire country, since that would be a really embarrassing situation. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 20th.
	# As the last of their number had finished changing, the druid ancients began the long march to their holy spring, for it was only in those sacred waters that the sacred rite of Cat Snorkeling could commence. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]]		# As the last of their number had finished changing, the druid ancients began the long march to their holy spring, for it was only in those sacred waters that the sacred rite of Cat Snorkeling could commence. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]]
			# My situation grew slightly better, as the fangs and claws grew in, but I was still at a disadvantage because he had the gun, and I was strapped down to the table. --[[User:Concerned Reader\|Concerned Reader]] 03:24, 7 July 2009 (UTC)
	{{fiction}}		{{fiction}}

Lloyd Brunnel: hehe, "Cat Snorkeling"

2009-03-10T21:44:22Z

hehe, "Cat Snorkeling"

← Older revision		Revision as of 16:44, 10 March 2009
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	# Like light from a tower, a tower positioned on the edge between the land and the wine-dark sea so it can direct phosphorescence at passing ships so that they do not crash and sink and cause merchants to lose quite a lot of money, he looked at him as he diminished in statute, and he asked him, not really expecting an answer, "How did it come to this?" --[[User:Joysweeper\|Joysweeper]] 05:20, 20 February 2009 (UTC)		# Like light from a tower, a tower positioned on the edge between the land and the wine-dark sea so it can direct phosphorescence at passing ships so that they do not crash and sink and cause merchants to lose quite a lot of money, he looked at him as he diminished in statute, and he asked him, not really expecting an answer, "How did it come to this?" --[[User:Joysweeper\|Joysweeper]] 05:20, 20 February 2009 (UTC)
	# When practicing magic it is important that one is careful not to do something stupid like create a ravenous plague of were-plushies that ends up wiping out your entire country, since that would be a really embarrassing situation. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 20th.		# When practicing magic it is important that one is careful not to do something stupid like create a ravenous plague of were-plushies that ends up wiping out your entire country, since that would be a really embarrassing situation. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 20th.
			# As the last of their number had finished changing, the druid ancients began the long march to their holy spring, for it was only in those sacred waters that the sacred rite of Cat Snorkeling could commence. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]]
	{{fiction}}		{{fiction}}

Lloyd Brunnel at 13:55, 21 February 2009

2009-02-21T13:55:44Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 08:55, 21 February 2009
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	# The small Swedish town of Uger has many strange traditions, but one of them, the "Running of the Furries", was about to get a hell of alot stranger. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 19th		# The small Swedish town of Uger has many strange traditions, but one of them, the "Running of the Furries", was about to get a hell of alot stranger. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 19th
	# Like light from a tower, a tower positioned on the edge between the land and the wine-dark sea so it can direct phosphorescence at passing ships so that they do not crash and sink and cause merchants to lose quite a lot of money, he looked at him as he diminished in statute, and he asked him, not really expecting an answer, "How did it come to this?" --[[User:Joysweeper\|Joysweeper]] 05:20, 20 February 2009 (UTC)		# Like light from a tower, a tower positioned on the edge between the land and the wine-dark sea so it can direct phosphorescence at passing ships so that they do not crash and sink and cause merchants to lose quite a lot of money, he looked at him as he diminished in statute, and he asked him, not really expecting an answer, "How did it come to this?" --[[User:Joysweeper\|Joysweeper]] 05:20, 20 February 2009 (UTC)
	# When practicing magic it is important that one is careful not to do something stupid like create a ravenous plague of were-plushies that ends up wiping out your entire country since that would be a really embarrassing situation. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 20th.		# When practicing magic it is important that one is careful not to do something stupid like create a ravenous plague of were-plushies that ends up wiping out your entire country, since that would be a really embarrassing situation. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 20th.
	{{fiction}}		{{fiction}}

199.235.123.237 at 16:27, 20 February 2009

2009-02-20T16:27:57Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 11:27, 20 February 2009
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	# The small Swedish town of Uger has many strange traditions, but one of them, the "Running of the Furries", was about to get a hell of alot stranger. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 19th		# The small Swedish town of Uger has many strange traditions, but one of them, the "Running of the Furries", was about to get a hell of alot stranger. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 19th
	# Like light from a tower, a tower positioned on the edge between the land and the wine-dark sea so it can direct phosphorescence at passing ships so that they do not crash and sink and cause merchants to lose quite a lot of money, he looked at him as he diminished in statute, and he asked him, not really expecting an answer, "How did it come to this?" --[[User:Joysweeper\|Joysweeper]] 05:20, 20 February 2009 (UTC)		# Like light from a tower, a tower positioned on the edge between the land and the wine-dark sea so it can direct phosphorescence at passing ships so that they do not crash and sink and cause merchants to lose quite a lot of money, he looked at him as he diminished in statute, and he asked him, not really expecting an answer, "How did it come to this?" --[[User:Joysweeper\|Joysweeper]] 05:20, 20 February 2009 (UTC)
	# When practicing magic it is important that one is careful not to do something stupid like create a ravenous plague of were-plushies that ends up wiping out your entire country since that would be a embarrassing situation. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 20th.		# When practicing magic it is important that one is careful not to do something stupid like create a ravenous plague of were-plushies that ends up wiping out your entire country since that would be a really embarrassing situation. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 20th.
	{{fiction}}		{{fiction}}

199.235.123.237 at 16:27, 20 February 2009

2009-02-20T16:27:35Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 11:27, 20 February 2009
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	# The small Swedish town of Uger has many strange traditions, but one of them, the "Running of the Furries", was about to get a hell of alot stranger. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 19th		# The small Swedish town of Uger has many strange traditions, but one of them, the "Running of the Furries", was about to get a hell of alot stranger. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 19th
	# Like light from a tower, a tower positioned on the edge between the land and the wine-dark sea so it can direct phosphorescence at passing ships so that they do not crash and sink and cause merchants to lose quite a lot of money, he looked at him as he diminished in statute, and he asked him, not really expecting an answer, "How did it come to this?" --[[User:Joysweeper\|Joysweeper]] 05:20, 20 February 2009 (UTC)		# Like light from a tower, a tower positioned on the edge between the land and the wine-dark sea so it can direct phosphorescence at passing ships so that they do not crash and sink and cause merchants to lose quite a lot of money, he looked at him as he diminished in statute, and he asked him, not really expecting an answer, "How did it come to this?" --[[User:Joysweeper\|Joysweeper]] 05:20, 20 February 2009 (UTC)
	# When practicing magic it is important that one is careful not to do something stupid like create a ravenous plague of were-plushies that ends up wiping out your entire country since that would be a embarrassing situation. --[[User:~~LloydBrunnel~~\|Lloyd]] February 20th.		# When practicing magic it is important that one is careful not to do something stupid like create a ravenous plague of were-plushies that ends up wiping out your entire country since that would be a embarrassing situation. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 20th.
	{{fiction}}		{{fiction}}

199.235.123.237 at 16:27, 20 February 2009

2009-02-20T16:27:20Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 11:27, 20 February 2009
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	# The small Swedish town of Uger has many strange traditions, but one of them, the "Running of the Furries", was about to get a hell of alot stranger. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 19th		# The small Swedish town of Uger has many strange traditions, but one of them, the "Running of the Furries", was about to get a hell of alot stranger. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 19th
	# Like light from a tower, a tower positioned on the edge between the land and the wine-dark sea so it can direct phosphorescence at passing ships so that they do not crash and sink and cause merchants to lose quite a lot of money, he looked at him as he diminished in statute, and he asked him, not really expecting an answer, "How did it come to this?" --[[User:Joysweeper\|Joysweeper]] 05:20, 20 February 2009 (UTC)		# Like light from a tower, a tower positioned on the edge between the land and the wine-dark sea so it can direct phosphorescence at passing ships so that they do not crash and sink and cause merchants to lose quite a lot of money, he looked at him as he diminished in statute, and he asked him, not really expecting an answer, "How did it come to this?" --[[User:Joysweeper\|Joysweeper]] 05:20, 20 February 2009 (UTC)
			# When practicing magic it is important that one is careful not to do something stupid like create a ravenous plague of were-plushies that ends up wiping out your entire country since that would be a embarrassing situation. --[[User:LloydBrunnel\|Lloyd]] February 20th.
	{{fiction}}		{{fiction}}

Joysweeper at 05:20, 20 February 2009

2009-02-20T05:20:52Z

← Older revision		Revision as of 00:20, 20 February 2009
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	# "You blood sucking leech!" she yelled, throwing another plate at him across the kitchen; "Only on Tuesdays!" Marty protested, ducking for cover. --[[User:Dani\|Dani]] 22:49, 18 February 2009 (UTC)		# "You blood sucking leech!" she yelled, throwing another plate at him across the kitchen; "Only on Tuesdays!" Marty protested, ducking for cover. --[[User:Dani\|Dani]] 22:49, 18 February 2009 (UTC)
	# The small Swedish town of Uger has many strange traditions, but one of them, the "Running of the Furries", was about to get a hell of alot stranger. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 19th		# The small Swedish town of Uger has many strange traditions, but one of them, the "Running of the Furries", was about to get a hell of alot stranger. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] February 19th
			# Like light from a tower, a tower positioned on the edge between the land and the wine-dark sea so it can direct phosphorescence at passing ships so that they do not crash and sink and cause merchants to lose quite a lot of money, he looked at him as he diminished in statute, and he asked him, not really expecting an answer, "How did it come to this?" --[[User:Joysweeper\|Joysweeper]] 05:20, 20 February 2009 (UTC)

	{{fiction}}		{{fiction}}

← Older revision		Revision as of 07:09, 9 July 2009
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	{{author note\|In honor of the [http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/ Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest], a competition to create the worst opening sentence to the worst possible novel, I have created this page that I hope will host the worst opening sentences to the worst possible TF stories. The first two are just starters but if you think you can do worse (and I hope you can) please feel free to add to this. Don't forget to sign your work either!}}		{{author note\|In honor of the [http://www.bulwer-lytton.com/ Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest], a competition to create the worst opening sentence to the worst possible novel, I have created this page that I hope will host the worst opening sentences to the worst possible TF stories. The first two are just starters but if you think you can do worse (and I hope you can) please feel free to add to this. Don't forget to sign your work either!}} {{fiction}}

	# Alex collapsed in pain as the change began; he felt his body convulse and writhe and his mind give way to an orgy of feral instincts and lost humanity as the first strand of fur was birthed from his arm. [[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]]		# Alex collapsed in pain as the change began; he felt his body convulse and writhe and his mind give way to an orgy of feral instincts and lost humanity as the first strand of fur was birthed from his arm. [[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]]
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	# When Nick had climbed across the fence into the forbidden house, he ''had'' seen the sign that said "STUPID trespassers will be turned into STUPID animals!", but since he was just a normal trespasser, and not a stupid trespasser, he ignored it, because he sure as hell wasn't stupid. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]]		# When Nick had climbed across the fence into the forbidden house, he ''had'' seen the sign that said "STUPID trespassers will be turned into STUPID animals!", but since he was just a normal trespasser, and not a stupid trespasser, he ignored it, because he sure as hell wasn't stupid. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]]
	# The irony was that long-time chocolate lover Tony was turning to that which could not eat chocolate: a dog...in the ''Land of Unlimited Amounts of Free Chocolate For Everyone Twenty-Four-Seven''. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]] 15:55, 7 July 2009 (UTC)		# The irony was that long-time chocolate lover Tony was turning to that which could not eat chocolate: a dog...in the ''Land of Unlimited Amounts of Free Chocolate For Everyone Twenty-Four-Seven''. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]] 15:55, 7 July 2009 (UTC)
	~~{{fiction}}~~
	# Our story begins on a small farm in the praries--which may make you think this is about someone turning into a horse or a cow, but what if I told you this was a story about a young boy and his howler monkey? --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] July 9 2009		# Our story begins on a small farm in the praries--which may make you think this is about someone turning into a horse or a cow, but what if I told you this was a story about a young boy and his howler monkey? --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]] July 9 2009

← Older revision		Revision as of 10:55, 7 July 2009
Line 14:		Line 14:
	# As the last of their number had finished changing, the druid ancients began the long march to their holy spring, for it was only in those sacred waters that the sacred rite of Cat Snorkeling could commence. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]]		# As the last of their number had finished changing, the druid ancients began the long march to their holy spring, for it was only in those sacred waters that the sacred rite of Cat Snorkeling could commence. --[[User:Lloyd Brunnel\|Lloyd]]
	# My situation grew slightly better, as the fangs and claws grew in, but I was still at a disadvantage because he had the gun, and I was strapped down to the table. --[[User:Concerned Reader\|Concerned Reader]] 03:24, 7 July 2009 (UTC)		# My situation grew slightly better, as the fangs and claws grew in, but I was still at a disadvantage because he had the gun, and I was strapped down to the table. --[[User:Concerned Reader\|Concerned Reader]] 03:24, 7 July 2009 (UTC)
			# As Ben's entire body began to turn soft and brown and stinky, he decided to blame his friend, who'd offered him ten bucks to run over to anyone across the street and scream "EAT MY POO!"; then again, maybe he shouldn't have chosen the person who had this wierd glowy pointy stick in the first place. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]]
			# When Nick had climbed across the fence into the forbidden house, he ''had'' seen the sign that said "STUPID trespassers will be turned into STUPID animals!", but since he was just a normal trespasser, and not a stupid trespasser, he ignored it, because he sure as hell wasn't stupid. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]]
			# The irony was that long-time chocolate lover Tony was turning to that which could not eat chocolate: a dog...in the ''Land of Unlimited Amounts of Free Chocolate For Everyone Twenty-Four-Seven''. --[[User:WolfyDrake95\|Drake]] 15:55, 7 July 2009 (UTC)
	{{fiction}}		{{fiction}}